About machiko : I believe in nothing. Not the end and not the start.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was looking at the skeleton of a human male that we have in out biology classroom. I picked up the hand to examine the bones in the finger, and had the sudden realization that this is the only time that I have held hands with a boy. I'm a junior in college. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46463) - you deserved it (6182)
On 05/28/2009 at 3:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was watching tv on the couch. My mom then kicked me off so she could lie down. Exhausted, I asked if I could sit at the end. She said no. A minute later she called the dog to come sit with her. As I was sitting on the ground, my mom told me to move because "the dog can't see the TV." FML
I agree, your life sucks (66151) - you deserved it (3552)
On 05/24/2009 at 2:05pm - animals - by holly (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I kissed my husband and said "I love you." Thats when our 5 year old son said to my husband "How can you love her so much if she's so ugly?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (50883) - you deserved it (2645)
On 05/21/2009 at 8:20pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my friend and I decided to wear a new red lipstick. The guy I like turned around, looked at her and said, "Red is a really interesting, sexy color. Pretty bold. Not bad." and he smiled. I waited, smiling also, only for him frown and say, "Your teeth are REALLY yellow." FML
I agree, your life sucks (38175) - you deserved it (11479)
On 05/20/2009 at 2:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I called the guy I've liked for a long time and told him how I felt. He didn't say anything except for "hello." After I spilled my feelings, I hear "Haha, just kidding I'm not here right now! Call me back later!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (41821) - you deserved it (7353)
On 05/16/2009 at 5:06pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my 3-year-old said, "Mommy, I can share my teddy grahams with you." I said, "Thanks, honey, you're so sweet." And I ate a few. When I popped the last one in my mouth, I said, "Oh no, all gone!" She said, "That's okay, I have more." Then pulled the next handful out of her underwear. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50270) - you deserved it (5201)
On 05/13/2009 at 9:45pm - kids - by chelserusera (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I went to the pet store to get mice for my mom's snakes. While checking out, the guy working behind the register asked what kind of snakes I had. I told him they were my mom's and he mentioned this crazy woman that talks to her snakes. That's my mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43862) - you deserved it (3719)
On 05/07/2009 at 1:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I was talking to my boyfriend on the phone. After a short pause I hear him say "I love you." Smiling I say, "I love you too." Then he says, "I was talking to my dog." FML
I agree, your life sucks (47843) - you deserved it (4089)
On 05/07/2009 at 8:39am - love - by TrulyYours (woman) - United States (Maine)
Today, I was laying in bed naked and blindfolded. I told my boyfriend he could do anything he wanted to me. About 30 minutes later I get out of bed and find him in the computer room play World of Warcraft. His friends needed him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (80978) - you deserved it (12244)
On 05/01/2009 at 1:40pm - intimacy - by chelle (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I bought a box of Fruit Loops. When I got home, I noticed a free prize would be in the box. I sifted through the box, looking for the small toy. It wasn't in there. I don't know what is more sad, the fact that I got ripped off by a children's cereal or that I'm 21 and upset by it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41416) - you deserved it (10255)
On 04/26/2009 at 10:29pm - misc - by ahhnotoy (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, at my grandmothers funeral I tried my hardest not to cry, only allowing tears to fall and not making any noise, to be respectful at her funeral. Afterwards, my mother tells my father that I didn't cry, which obviously meant that I didn't love my grandmother and had no soul. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51304) - you deserved it (3098)
On 04/24/2009 at 9:44pm - misc - by baddream (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, my son and I were on an airplane playing "I Spy" to pass the time. The game went back and forth a few times when my son said, "I spy something yellow." After pointing out numerous yellow objects on the plane I gave up. He said, "Daddy! It's your teeth!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (44314) - you deserved it (13313)
On 04/22/2009 at 3:46pm - kids - by WTF (man) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, the $300 ring my boyfriend gave me for my birthday slipped off my finger... into the toilet. I had to sift through my own poo to get it back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52850) - you deserved it (13737)
On 04/20/2009 at 6:05am - misc - by ohhelllllno (woman) - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)
Today, I celebrated my 21st birthday. My boyfriend of almost 3 years gave me a big pink vibrator. Thinking it was a joke I said: "I won't need this as long as I have you!" His reply: "That's what I wanted to talk to you about." FML
I agree, your life sucks (96368) - you deserved it (5006)
On 04/18/2009 at 3:20am - love - by mylifesucks (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)
Today, I went to the doctor and found out that I am infertile. When I called my boyfriend of 2 years (whom I was hoping to have a future with) to talk to him about it, all he said was "So does this mean I don't have to wear a condom anymore?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (52318) - you deserved it (6091)
On 04/17/2009 at 2:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Delaware)
Monday 17 June 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
