machiko

Search for a member

machiko

16Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 5 March 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 25057
  • Number of comments : 196
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About machiko : I believe in nothing. Not the end and not the start.

machiko's page activity

Visits<b>TheDarkLight</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 11:07am<b>ananicosia</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 8:24am<b>SugarRush905</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 3:28am<b>Bullshitticus</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 9:56am<b>Rozeyyy</b> - the 07/10/2016 at 9:07pm<b>ptvbabe229</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 6:03pm<b>Helipilot86</b> - the 07/01/2016 at 1:16pm<b>AtomOfEpic</b> - the 06/30/2016 at 7:19am<b>ShroudedKnife</b> - the 06/28/2016 at 12:09am<b>itssnotfunny</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 2:07am<b>thatoneguy255</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 3:18pm<b>PresAgent</b> - the 06/09/2016 at 7:18am<b>cheyluvsturtles</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 8:43pm<b>lego_otter</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 10:20pm<b>GuardedCrayfish</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 7:24pm<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 3:30am<b>BonerFart</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 5:09pm<b>BestOrginalName</b> - the 05/07/2016 at 10:07pm

Fucked!<b>SugarRush905</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 9:28am<b>AtomOfEpic</b> - the 06/30/2016 at 1:19pm<b>cheyluvsturtles</b> - the 06/09/2016 at 2:43am<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 9:30am<b>Joshwarrior</b> - the 02/09/2016 at 10:45pm<b>JCX2</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 11:14pm<b>FyeahPoet</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 8:15am<b>Ethan_Anonymous</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 11:13am<b>gqlmno</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 2:59pm<b>mattv88</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 7:00am<b>jomar_19</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 5:34am<b>Bree06</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 1:31pm<b>MrFloooo</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 7:20am<b>sherry_berryxoxo</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 9:27pm<b>FiendHunter</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 5:37am

machiko's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

machiko's favorite FMLs

Today, I've been considering breaking up with my girlfriend so I don't have to buy her a Christmas present. FML

by fmlguy / 12/09/2010 at 10:19pm / Money

Today, while driving home with my boyfriend, we started discussing how clean our driving records were. I was boasting about how I'd never been in an accident when I hit a moose. FML

by Anonymous / 12/08/2010 at 12:07pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Transportation

Today, after receiving a lovely massage from my boyfriend, I was lying topless in bed beside him. Just as I was thinking this would be the perfect opportunity for some intimacy, he looks at me and says, "my mom is SO awesome." FML

by ooblie / 12/08/2010 at 3:22am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, feeling so depressed to the point of having suicidal thoughts, I texted a girl I had a crush on. Her response? "Can you please delete my number, you're getting annoying." FML

by whyme / 12/08/2010 at 1:26am / Health

Today, while sitting on the bus a stranger sat next to me, farted, put his hand under his butt to smell what it was like, and then sniffed it throughout the whole ride while glancing at me. FML

by Anonymous / 12/06/2010 at 11:53pm / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, my daughter and husband decided to surprise me at work. A whole bunch of my co-workers were standing around me when she ran up and hugged me. Her face is level with my crotch. She immediately jumps back from the hug and says "ewwww smells like fish." FML

by Anonymous / 12/06/2010 at 9:58pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I felt like spicing up our marriage, so I thought I'd surprise my husband when he got home from work. I put on my sexiest teddy, lit some candles, and laid on the bed. He walked in the room, looked at me for a second, farted, then asked me what was for dinner. FML

by Anonymous / 12/05/2010 at 1:57am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I called up Verizon Wireless to "complain" about my phone service. I really had nothing to complain about, I was just that lonely that I wanted someone to talk to. FML

by Anonymous / 12/02/2010 at 10:22pm / United States (North Dakota) / Miscellaneous

Today, a guy at my work asked if I could fix his computer in his cubicle. The first thing I see on the screen when he logs me onto it is an anime porn game with tentacles. My boss walks by, stares at me and then laughs uncontrollably. FML

by Jack / 11/30/2010 at 3:48am / Intimacy

Today, I found out that my boyfriend has been cheating on me by finding orange panties in my closet. His excuse was "they're a Christmas gift." Thanks honey, I get panties that won't fit, and have little brown streaks. FML

by Anonymous / 11/29/2010 at 10:16am / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Intimacy

Today, I received my acceptance letter to one of the most prestigious universities in the US, as well as a nice scholarship. I was so proud of myself, I eagerly showed my dad, hoping he would shed a tear or two. His only words were, "Just get a job so you can get the hell out of my house." FML

by Anonymous / 11/23/2010 at 11:41pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking off my underwear to change into fresh clothes. Pulling them down, I realize there's a big fat spider in them. Not only did I have a spider chilling with my genitals the whole day, but I'm deathly afraid of them. FML

by dickwebs / 11/21/2010 at 10:42pm / Germany / Animals

Today, I went out to eat with my girlfriend. The waiter came up and was being nice. He said, "What can I get you two gentlemen?" FML

by mynameisarmpit / 11/15/2010 at 1:48am / Love

Today, my boyfriend told me I was the only girl he'd ever text, call, or flirt with again. Later on he told two other girls exactly the same thing on Facebook, not realizing that everybody can read wall messages. FML

by girlwithaprob / 11/13/2010 at 4:45pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I realized I've been playing too much Call of Duty. I started screaming, "Spawn, bitch! Spawn!" at my microwavable pizza while it was in the microwave. FML

by Anonymous / 11/13/2010 at 12:55pm / United States (Florida) / Geek