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lzmo

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lzmo
  • Town/Country : Norway
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 912
  • Number of comments : 71
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About lzmo : Insert text..

lzmo's last visitors

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lzmo's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of lzmo's badges

lzmo's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm quite ill. My new step-mother believes that the genetic wheat allergy I got from my mother would have gone away since she's now married to my father instead. Looks like dad picked a winner. FML

#20057050
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21708) - you deserved it (977)

On 09/04/2012 at 4:53am - misc - by hooligyn123 - United States

Today, after years of bad blood, my husband decided to invite his parents to dinner. After making rude remarks about my pregnancy, his dad eventually muttered that I'm a slut. My husband punched him, his wife called the police, and now I'm all alone while he sits in a jail cell for battery. FML

#20030486
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25323) - you deserved it (1450)

On 08/19/2012 at 7:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, on more than one occasion, I was mistaken for my boyfriend's mother, by his own family. FML

#19998610
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20220) - you deserved it (1969)

On 08/02/2012 at 3:16pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my 17-year-old daughter's friend told her that superglue works well as lip gloss. She tried it. FML

#19993820
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21978) - you deserved it (3829)

On 07/31/2012 at 1:36am - kids - by mcase - United States (California)

Today, I was walking to the movie theatre with my boyfriend, when three guys muscled over and told us to hand over our phones. My boyfriend didn't waste any time pushing past me and running like hell, leaving me in tears and almost having a panic attack. FML

#19992901
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26861) - you deserved it (2459)

On 07/30/2012 at 4:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Ukraine (Kyyiv)

Today, at my job, an old lady kept calling her inhaler a blow job. I kindly explained to her why she couldn't call her inhaler that. She continued to ask me for a blow job in front of visitors. I had to say yes. FML

#19986519
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20510) - you deserved it (1552)

On 07/27/2012 at 12:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, after being upset at the fact that my phone was stolen at work, I received a note on my locker saying, "100 bucks and you get the phone back." My phone is being held for ransom. FML

#19972193
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18136) - you deserved it (1203)

On 07/22/2012 at 1:04am - work - by missingphoneproblems (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend thought it appropriate to let me know that doing the "duck face" in my Facebook pictures "highlights my mustache." FML

#19951439
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5953) - you deserved it (49272)

On 07/17/2012 at 7:30pm - love - by mustachio101 (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, after a particularly difficult late night workout at the gym, I decided to shower in the locker room. I must have passed out, because I later woke up naked, surrounded by police after someone called to report a dead body in the shower. FML

#19913171
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23658) - you deserved it (2491)

On 07/09/2012 at 3:06am - misc - by wetandnaked (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was having sex with the guy I've been in love with for years. I moaned, "say my name." He didn't know it. FML

#19873262
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30250) - you deserved it (9496)

On 06/30/2012 at 9:35pm - intimacy - by say my name -

Today, I found out from her teacher that my daughter in kindergarten gets the little boys in her class to play grown-ups with her. It's basically dry humping and groaning. FML

#19822134
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27843) - you deserved it (8183)

On 06/21/2012 at 1:40am - kids - by Bad Mommy - United States (California)

Today, my grandmother saw me for the first time in years. "Not all your clothes have to be as tight as condoms, you tramp," is probably the nicest greeting she's ever given me. FML

#19775546
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25402) - you deserved it (7857)

On 06/12/2012 at 7:58am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Maine)

Today, when I was ordering pizza, I got a text from my mom saying "I love you". When the man thanked me I accidentally said, "I love you too." FML

#19719938
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20266) - you deserved it (4427)

On 06/02/2012 at 8:47am - misc - by lol112 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I almost got kidnapped. Again. FML

#19707961
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30068) - you deserved it (4129)

On 05/31/2012 at 1:28am - misc - by gonavybeatarmy - United States (California)

Today, I had a babysitting job. When I got there, the parents were rushing out the door and told me they'd left instructions for the kids on the table. The first bullet point stated that the oldest was convinced she is possessed by the devil, but just to ignore it. Three more hours to go. FML

#19701580
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19790) - you deserved it (1057)

On 05/29/2012 at 9:55pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)



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