[fr]
[it]
[es2]
[tr]
[de]
[ru]
[se]

Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?
Email notification?

lxclark

Search for a member

lxclark
  • Town/Country : Auckland, New Zealand
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 1 November 1992 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 3237
  • Number of comments : 86
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

lxclark's last visitors

katgurllisaloiseRiileyiluvu1262pikapolonicaMiss_lunaticlolle_p0pysrhaelxChrissyPandalmc94sugarnspicee

lxclark's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

I NEED to know!

You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.

See all of lxclark's badges

lxclark's favorite FMLs

Today, I ordered a pizza. I paid and tipped the pizza guy, and instead of saying goodbye, I got tongue-tied and said, "I love you, boo." FML

#18546937 (176)

I agree, your life sucks (3872) - you deserved it (7218)

On 12/18/2011 at 6:36pm - misc - by Musicfreak (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, on the subway, a woman got off without her suitcase. I grabbed the case, chased her onto the platform, and shouted, "You forgot your suitcase!" while the doors closed behind me. In actual fact, it wasn't her suitcase, and its actual owner was still on the train. FML

#18162360 (110)

I agree, your life sucks (22694) - you deserved it (6782) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 11/05/2011 at 3:11am - misc - by Lavalise - France

Today, I have been pissing blood for 2 hours, ever since some douche in a Nixon mask ran up and slugged me in the kidney. FML

#17981728 (183)

I agree, your life sucks (9455) - you deserved it (656)

On 10/14/2011 at 11:09am - health - by Nixontones - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was at my job in the Halloween store. I had to tell someone, "Please stop hitting the Bieber wig with that pimp cane." FML

#17883689 (145)

I agree, your life sucks (16949) - you deserved it (2320)

On 10/02/2011 at 1:15am - work - by katt_is_here (woman) - United States (Colorado)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I found out that the new management position I'm supposed to start in two days was delayed for a month and a half. I already quit my current job and called my boss gay. FML

#17801951 (122)

I agree, your life sucks (6483) - you deserved it (31128)

On 09/22/2011 at 1:20am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, while at the beach, my little brother's hat blew off. I chased after it before I completely lost sight and realized I was no match for the wind. I get back and he's wearing the hat. I chased a fucking trash bag for a mile thinking it was his hat. FML

#17729862 (122)

I agree, your life sucks (15490) - you deserved it (6561)

On 09/12/2011 at 6:32pm - misc - by justhereforlaughs (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I thought my hamster might be lonely, so I went to the pet shop and bought a new one to keep him company. The new hamster killed the old one. FML

#17727112 (209)

I agree, your life sucks (9112) - you deserved it (3577)

On 09/12/2011 at 9:52am - animals - by squeak (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, at my dental practice, we received a shipment of the stupid flavoured gloves my boss ordered to make the place more "friendly to the kids". I started working in an adult patient's mouth, when he decided to start creepily making out with my fingers. FML

#17661211 (144)

I agree, your life sucks (24185) - you deserved it (1706)

On 09/04/2011 at 12:42pm - work - by -- - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML

#17586114 (267)

I agree, your life sucks (22917) - you deserved it (3717)

On 08/26/2011 at 1:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my step dad stole over $400 worth of savings from me. He spent it alcohol, fireworks, and a very large sombrero. FML

#17161191 (228)

I agree, your life sucks (10438) - you deserved it (1196)

On 07/18/2011 at 9:08am - misc - by _TaToRtOt_ (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, in an amphitheater, someone hit the back of my head. As I turned around, the guy apologized and said he mistook me for his friend. I changed seats, and after a while, I got hit a second time. He was wrong again. FML

#17159323 (112)

I agree, your life sucks (22025) - you deserved it (2290)

On 07/18/2011 at 3:09am - misc - by fthislyfe (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, my house got robbed. They left a note: "Next time, we steal your souls." FML

#17156963 (361)

I agree, your life sucks (29519) - you deserved it (2268)

On 07/18/2011 at 12:26am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, my dog was scooped up by an owl. FML

#17115448 (509)

I agree, your life sucks (42545) - you deserved it (6491)

On 07/15/2011 at 12:24am - animals - by flipnazn - United States (Texas)

Today, my brother got a pet ferret. He told me it had a flexible spine, so I bent it backwards. It farted, and clawed my face. FML

#16908147 (313)

I agree, your life sucks (7552) - you deserved it (53922)

On 06/29/2011 at 10:55am - misc - by ashleyrae (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I let my new puppy outside for the first time. When I went to get him, I saw a man running off with him. FML

#16651474 (263)

I agree, your life sucks (36064) - you deserved it (7822)

On 06/13/2011 at 9:46pm - misc - by robertsonjimmy - United States (Mississippi)