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luke1995fg

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luke1995fg

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1948
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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luke1995fg's page activity

Visits<b>Ilikepie467</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 11:34pm

luke1995fg's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of luke1995fg's badges

luke1995fg's favorite FMLs

Today, someone nearly hit me with their car, so I flipped them the finger. They turned back around and tried to run me over. FML

#18585718
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26281) - you deserved it (9180)

On 12/23/2011 at 1:42am - misc - by badidea - United States (Minnesota)

Today, after explaining to my two year old that we were going bra shopping, he decided to announce to the entire bank that we were going to buy Mommy some boobies. FML

#18561778
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17003) - you deserved it (23110)

On 12/20/2011 at 1:59pm - kids - by imamomma - United States

Today, I made a fake Facebook account for a girl, and then set my relationship status to make it look like the fake person was my girlfriend. Someone found out and hacked the fake account. My fake girlfriend just dumped me over Facebook. FML

#18547813
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9883) - you deserved it (58649)

On 12/18/2011 at 8:24pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, I found out my boyfriend has been using my moisturiser as lube when he wanks. It's $90 per bottle. FML

#18542625
337 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32875) - you deserved it (15824)

On 12/18/2011 at 5:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, I got screamed at, threatened, cursed, and spat on by an elderly couple for "running them off the road". I was driving an ambulance, lights and sirens on, with a 4 year old in the back who couldn't breathe. They were going 20 in a 50mph zone for 2 miles straight. FML

#18542050
309 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47530) - you deserved it (2172)

On 12/18/2011 at 2:44am - work - by Sedici - United States

Today, my five-year-old daughter told me she was going to throw up. I told her to rush to the bathroom. I followed her a few seconds later, only to find her sitting on the toilet and vomiting onto the floor. FML

#18534964
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31555) - you deserved it (5883) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/17/2011 at 10:42am - kids - by espylone - France

Today, two American guys attacked me for not speaking their language. I'm from England, and they said I'm speaking my own language wrong. FML

#18525821
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36290) - you deserved it (6289)

On 12/16/2011 at 3:50am - misc - by Brit - Reserved

Today, my dad took me to the 'Super Butcher'. It's basically a warehouse turned into a giant, walk-in meat freezer, complete with headless pig carcasses. I'm a vegetarian. FML

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML

#18483356
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48649) - you deserved it (7735)

On 12/11/2011 at 6:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I saw Santa. He gave me the finger. FML

#18378519
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24192) - you deserved it (5025)

On 11/28/2011 at 7:44pm - misc - by moopymoplady - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting a historical war bunker when I accidentally let rip a small fart. My boyfriend responded with a horribly loud, horrendous fart, and loudly announced, "This is war." There were people, lots of people. FML

#18374141
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29442) - you deserved it (8734)

On 11/28/2011 at 7:34am - misc - by Dani - Reserved

Today, my boyfriend decided that vaginal, oral, and anal sex are starting to get boring. Let's just say that my armpit is now drenched in lube. I'm afraid of what he's going to want to try once he gets bored of this. FML

#18370889
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38076) - you deserved it (9351)

On 11/27/2011 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend told me that the only reason he likes me is because I let him watch porn without throwing a fuss. FML

#17976289
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29338) - you deserved it (6469)

On 10/13/2011 at 5:30pm - intimacy - by serenti - Sweden

Today, I overheard my husband talking to our 6 year-old about animals for a project. I listened, thinking it was cute, until my husband said gleefully, "Remember to say this in your project: octopuses have 8 testicles." FML

#17973930
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26649) - you deserved it (3129)

On 10/13/2011 at 8:24am - kids - by daddoesn'tknowbest - United States

Today, after getting dumped by my boyfriend, I tried to find comfort in one of my closest friends. He embraced me while I struggled against tears, and after a few moments of silence said, "Hey, you know what? I would fuck you anytime. Anytime." FML

#17973250
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33949) - you deserved it (9278)

On 10/13/2011 at 3:19am - intimacy - by scewable (woman) - United States (California)



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