Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

luke1995fg

Online | Search for a member

luke1995fg

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1707
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

luke1995fg's page activity

Visits<b>Ilikepie467</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 11:34pm

luke1995fg's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of luke1995fg's badges

luke1995fg's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned how to use a fire extinguisher. Too bad it was on my brand new oven. FML

#18638561
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20097) - you deserved it (3843)

On 12/28/2011 at 9:53pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while cuddling, my boyfriend excused himself to get a napkin. When he came back, he nervously admitted he'd got a booger in my hair. He then couldn't get it completely out. FML

#18628918
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23387) - you deserved it (2315)

On 12/27/2011 at 9:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I noticed that my girlfriend has a deeper voice than I do. FML

#18613086
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28083) - you deserved it (7133)

On 12/26/2011 at 1:17am - love - by Cary (man) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my boyfriend of 4 years asked my dad if he could marry me, and my dad agreed. He then tells me that he's not going to propose for maybe another year at least, he "just wanted to get that out of the way." FML

#18610596
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26632) - you deserved it (3100)

On 12/25/2011 at 8:28pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I attended my extended family's Christmas dinner. All throughout, my grandmother kept complaining about how the food tasted like crap, and making sexual remarks such as how "the stuffings were far better in my day, if you know what I mean." FML

#18608467
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21976) - you deserved it (2455)

On 12/25/2011 at 3:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, I went on a date with a guy I've had a crush on for a while. I shaved my legs and armpits and wore a short dress. It wasn't until I got to the meeting that I noticed I only shaved one of my legs. FML

#18593326
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29049) - you deserved it (15934)

On 12/23/2011 at 10:22pm - love - by bigmistake - United States (Illinois)

Today, I walked in on my daughter eating a handful of styrofoam packing pellets, because she thought they were Christmas candy. She's fourteen. What's next, eating rocks? FML

#18588984
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25919) - you deserved it (4311)

On 12/23/2011 at 1:23pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, someone nearly hit me with their car, so I flipped them the finger. They turned back around and tried to run me over. FML

#18585718
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26160) - you deserved it (9161)

On 12/23/2011 at 1:42am - misc - by badidea - United States (Minnesota)

Today, after explaining to my two year old that we were going bra shopping, he decided to announce to the entire bank that we were going to buy Mommy some boobies. FML

#18561778
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16951) - you deserved it (23049)

On 12/20/2011 at 1:59pm - kids - by imamomma - United States

Today, I made a fake Facebook account for a girl, and then set my relationship status to make it look like the fake person was my girlfriend. Someone found out and hacked the fake account. My fake girlfriend just dumped me over Facebook. FML

#18547813
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9550) - you deserved it (57604)

On 12/18/2011 at 8:24pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, I found out my boyfriend has been using my moisturiser as lube when he wanks. It's $90 per bottle. FML

#18542625
336 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32713) - you deserved it (15802)

On 12/18/2011 at 5:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, I got screamed at, threatened, cursed, and spat on by an elderly couple for "running them off the road". I was driving an ambulance, lights and sirens on, with a 4 year old in the back who couldn't breathe. They were going 20 in a 50mph zone for 2 miles straight. FML

#18542050
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47393) - you deserved it (2169)

On 12/18/2011 at 2:44am - work - by Sedici - United States

Today, my five-year-old daughter told me she was going to throw up. I told her to rush to the bathroom. I followed her a few seconds later, only to find her sitting on the toilet and vomiting onto the floor. FML

#18534964
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31453) - you deserved it (5874) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/17/2011 at 10:42am - kids - by espylone - France

Today, two American guys attacked me for not speaking their language. I'm from England, and they said I'm speaking my own language wrong. FML

#18525821
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36187) - you deserved it (6278)

On 12/16/2011 at 3:50am - misc - by Brit - Reserved

Today, my dad took me to the 'Super Butcher'. It's basically a warehouse turned into a giant, walk-in meat freezer, complete with headless pig carcasses. I'm a vegetarian. FML



FML's blog

  • AD_e's Illustrated FML
  • Hi gang ! It's Friday once more and time for us to go on a magical mystery tour around the brain of yet another illustrator. This week, things have happened around the world that were so depressing, I don't…

Monday 18 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: