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lucymalfoy

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 7 August 1985 (28 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1094
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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lucymalfoy's page activity

Visits<b>Tikwichka</b> - the 04/29/2010 at 1:49pm<b>jenniferhill</b> - the 04/22/2010 at 8:19pm

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lucymalfoy's favorite FMLs

Today, I was watching Free Willy with my boyfriend. It was at the part where the boy leaned into the water to give Willy a hug. I asked, "How do you even hug a whale?" My boyfriend rolled over and gave me a hug, and said, "Like this." FML

#7165792
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35640) - you deserved it (12774)

On 01/05/2010 at 5:03pm - love - by leigh2812 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I am in a very long line at the supermarket, gazing about in complete boredom when I spot a lady cradling what appears to be a cute newborn baby. Being enamored of all babies, I get off the line, go over and say "Oh, what a cute little baby!" The lady was holding a coconut. FML

#5762381
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8086) - you deserved it (41602)

On 10/10/2009 at 6:35pm - misc - by BEE (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, in the middle of an exam, I was escorted out by the campus police due to suspicion of a concealed weapon. The officers couldn't stop laughing for 20 minutes when they found out the weapon was metal knitting needles. FML

#5710708
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30212) - you deserved it (3320)

On 10/07/2009 at 8:38pm - misc - by dangerousknitter (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that the student tutor my son advised me to hire was my son's girlfriend. I have been paying her $20 an hour for the last 3 weeks to make out with my son in his room. FML

#5708797
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30342) - you deserved it (15095)

On 10/07/2009 at 7:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I showed my boyfriend the new tattoo of a butterfly that I'd gotten on my lower back. He said, "It looks like it's flying when your rolls jiggle." FML

#5688481
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12965) - you deserved it (37153)

On 10/06/2009 at 7:32pm - misc - by lovebigmacs (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, while cleaning up, I dropped a box of thumbtacks, spilling them all over the floor. As I fumbled to pick them up, the power went out. FML

#5589145
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43974) - you deserved it (3284)

On 10/01/2009 at 6:31pm - misc - by Ouchies (woman) - United States (Florida) - moderated by Kevin Nealon

Today, I went to the coffee shop for my usual morning latte before class. When I got my drink, I asked again to make sure it was soy. The barista assured me it was. It wasn't. I'm ridiculously lactose intolerant and just spent six hours throwing up because she was too lazy to correct her mistake. FML

#5564287
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39901) - you deserved it (3296)

On 09/30/2009 at 11:12am - health - by sick (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I finally found out that someone had stolen my debit card and maxed it out. The good news? Whoever it was forgot to change the address on the card, so everything they bought online has been shipped to me. The bad news? I've received 16 snuggies so far, and I'm still counting. FML

#5529870
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42448) - you deserved it (3198)

On 09/28/2009 at 4:36pm - money - by SnuggieOverload (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend with the cliché of the diamond ring in a champagne glass. Apparently there was an off-duty police officer across the room watching me slip the ring into the glass. He thought I was slipping in a date-rape drug and tackled me down before I could propose. FML

#5494730
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48218) - you deserved it (3724)

On 09/26/2009 at 10:18pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I spent 3 hours washing my hands to get the pony out of the soap bar. I'm 16. FML

#3297197
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11158) - you deserved it (50105)

On 06/28/2009 at 3:23am - misc - by Soapy (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I was at the movies with my mom and dad, and the preview to my "My Sisters Keeper" came on. The trailer started out with "Most babies are accidents..." Right as that line was finished my mom elbowed me and laughed. FML

#3295379
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57465) - you deserved it (4396)

On 06/28/2009 at 2:12am - kids - by A2 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. I opened my eyes to see his eyes fixed on something else. I turned my head to see what was so interesting. He was on his iPhone looking up recipes for things to wrap in bacon. FML

#3271801
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55388) - you deserved it (6872)

On 06/27/2009 at 10:29am - love - by a_B_c_D_e_F_g (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, a man from across the bar looked at me, pointed and said "MMMM, now THAT'S what I want." Offended, I confronted him to tell him I felt disrespected by him referring to me as 'that.' Turns out, he was pointing to the cheeseburger that the waitress behind me was holding. FML

#3207730
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7842) - you deserved it (47995)

On 06/25/2009 at 6:18pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my mom had one too many and announced to all of my friends that, if she had the opportunity, she would bang Gwen Stefani. FML

#2959113
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50270) - you deserved it (4151)

On 06/17/2009 at 12:25am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I facebooked my friends about my upcoming birthday party, and told them to keep the date free. I got several responses telling me that's not possible, because that's the day the new Harry Potter movie comes out. FML

#2935549
414 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39914) - you deserved it (27831)

On 06/16/2009 at 7:10am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



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