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luc887's favorite FMLs
Today, I bought some expensive fabric softener since I'm not too keen on my detergent's smell. Only after washing two weeks worth of laundry did I discover that mixed together they realistically mimic the smell of fresh puke. FML
by backtothelaundrettethen / 12/03/2012 at 6:40am / Germany / Miscellaneous
Today, while visiting my widowed great aunt, she took out her wedding rings and talked about the love she and my uncle had. Smiling, I told her that one day I hope to have as happy a marriage as theirs. Her response? "Knowing you, I wouldn't count on it." My mother sat there agreeing. FML
by Stupendous_ / 12/03/2012 at 2:17am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
by Gahh... / 12/03/2012 at 12:18am / Canada (British Columbia) / Health
Today, my mom hung her new "Christmas Clock" on the wall. It plays a different Christmas carol every hour, on the hour. It's only December 2nd and I'm already starting to understand why suicide rates sky rocket this time of year. FML
by Anonymous / 12/02/2012 at 11:06pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I came home from the hospital diagnosed with high blood pressure. It's caused by stress. My wife had a very long talk with my son about it. All the kid has been doing for the past 2 hours is scream at his Playstation. I'd rather be at the hospital. FML
by Nick / 12/02/2012 at 11:03pm / United States (Nevada) / Kids
by disembob / 12/02/2012 at 9:26pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
Today, my parents heard from my sister that I'd recently lost my virginity to my girlfriend. I've never been bitched out so viciously in my life, and yet my sister, whom everyone knows has had numerous casual sexual partners this year, is treated like a princess 24/7. FML
by Anonymous / 12/02/2012 at 1:55pm / United Kingdom (Suffolk) / Miscellaneous
Today, my mom and I took my senile grandmother to the mall, since she doesn't get out much. She complained it was hot, then took her clothing off in the middle of the food court. It took us thirty minutes to make her put her shirt back on. FML
by Sam / 12/02/2012 at 9:05am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous
by Ashley / 12/02/2012 at 5:16am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my guy friend kept complaining that no one had asked him to the dance, so he probably wasn't going to go. I suggested that we go together. He laughed until his face was bright red and said, "I don't think I'll ever get that desperate." FML
by Anna / 12/02/2012 at 3:03am / United States (Washington) / Love
by allbrokeup / 12/01/2012 at 6:54pm / Norway (Rogaland) / Love
Today, I went to Hollister with my grandmother. She immediately started yelling about the music being too loud, and ordered the staff to "shut the damn thing off". She was yelling at a bunch of mannequins. FML
by time to put you down, gran / 12/01/2012 at 5:53pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, while lighting a cigarette, I learned the hard way that the amount of styling mousse I used to get my curly hair to become manageable, is the roughly same amount that causes it to become highly flammable. FML
by Awkward / 12/01/2012 at 5:11pm / Bahrain / Health
Today, to scare my little brother I dressed up as the killer from the Scream movies. The outfit was a little too long on me, and I ended up falling down the stairs. Not only was he doubled over laughing, but so were the people in the emergency room. FML
by fieldmarshalclitter / 12/01/2012 at 3:21pm / United States / Health
by hinowdie / 12/01/2012 at 5:00am / United States / Miscellaneous