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lovex3vee

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lovex3vee

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  • Number of visits : 1054
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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lovex3vee's page activity

Visits<b>hare</b> - the 12/17/2013 at 9:22pm<b>ianharwood</b> - the 07/01/2013 at 12:01am<b>Justin_Conant28</b> - the 05/16/2013 at 5:28pm<b>fyourlifeusuck</b> - the 04/25/2013 at 2:43pm<b>abe10952</b> - the 03/16/2013 at 12:59pm

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lovex3vee's favorite FMLs

Today, the police called and told me that they had Alex in custody. Apparently, she had public sex with another woman and wants me to come bail her out. Alex is my mom. FML

#7014156
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25210) - you deserved it (2179)

On 12/29/2009 at 1:18pm - intimacy - by runescapeftw (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my girlfriend came over to my house. Hoping to get a little action, i started to make out with her. Unfortunately I was wearing basketball shorts so when I got an erection all she did was bat it back forth like a cat toy. FML

#6890097
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17300) - you deserved it (4532)

On 12/22/2009 at 8:09pm - intimacy - by shallowvomit1013 (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my girlfriend of two years broke up with me so she could "let her life flow in the direction she wants." Apparently that includes smoking, stealing and making out with other girls at parties. The best part? She wants to get back together "after she matures and gets it out of her system." FML

#6377568
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26727) - you deserved it (2647)

On 11/20/2009 at 4:30am - love - by ApparentlyIFail (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, a cat came up to me on the pavement so I petted it a little. An elderly man rode past on his bicycle and shouted "I'd like to stroke your pussy too!" FML

#6367890
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25296) - you deserved it (3420)

On 11/19/2009 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by pussystroker (woman) - United Kingdom (Peterborough)

Today, I spent the night with my guy, whom I hadn't seen in ages. In the middle of sex, he answered his phone, told me to be quiet, talked to the girl on the other end about how boring his day was, then left the room to finish talking to her. When he came back he asked if I felt like swallowing. FML

#6078276
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23601) - you deserved it (4139)

On 10/31/2009 at 12:31am - intimacy - by dtmfa (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a funny prank to put duct tape on my eyes while I was sleeping so that when I woke up, I would be blind. I have no more eyelashes. FML

#5848296
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37904) - you deserved it (2614)

On 10/16/2009 at 4:20am - misc - by xXx (man) - United States (California)

Today, my little sister was playing with her building blocks. All of a sudden, she began to cry and held her finger out to me. Assuming she had hurt it, I kissed it better, and tasted something odd on my lips. Turns out she wasn't hurt, she was crying because she had touched cat vomit. FML

#5714367
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31689) - you deserved it (8078)

On 10/07/2009 at 11:22pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was trying to keep myself occupied due to my recent breakup. I was reading this book someone gave me about animal communication, so after a while, I figured I'd give it a shot. Then it dawned on me; I'm single, at home on a Friday night, and I'm trying to talk to my dog. FML

#5190097
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36205) - you deserved it (6416)

On 09/11/2009 at 5:07pm - love - by fall3nrain (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend and I were starting to get in the mood. I get on top of him, lean down to kiss him, and he begins to laugh. Puzzled, I ask him why. He tells me that when I'm naked and on top of him, I remind him of a cow, with 'udders' . Offended, I go to get off. 'No no' he protests, 'a SEXY cow'. FML

#4936228
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33271) - you deserved it (4752)

On 08/30/2009 at 7:35pm - intimacy - by sigh (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend getting it on with the neighbour's daughter. As soon as he saw me, he started singing 'It Wasn't Me' by Shaggy, completely naked, still sitting with the girl. FML

#4933603
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54169) - you deserved it (4338)

On 08/30/2009 at 5:26pm - love - by shaggy (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to Knott's Berry Farm with my girlfriend. After we got off of Supreme Scream, the ride attendant asked her, "How was it?" She pointed to me and said, "It's like sex with this man, my boyfriend; intense, then disappointing because it only lasts like 30 seconds." FML

#4393930
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51166) - you deserved it (11200)

On 08/08/2009 at 9:41pm - intimacy - by blank13 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my husband made a replica of our family on The Sims 3. I also found out he killed me off a couple weeks ago and made a new wife, KiKi. FML

#4043992
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59381) - you deserved it (5437)

On 07/26/2009 at 12:28am - love - by nosrepamai82 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, after 9 months in our relationship, my boyfriend and I lost our virginity to each other. We had incredible, mind-blowing sex. An hour later, he broke up with me because apparently "my orgasm face is ugly." FML

#4031400
258 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71024) - you deserved it (8625)

On 07/25/2009 at 2:50pm - intimacy - by misopower (woman) - China (Henan)

Today, I was telling my dad about plans to go out late for a few drinks next week. My dad started his usual "YOU COULD GET RAPED!" lecture, before my brother sprang to my defence, "It's not like she's what they're after, is she?" Apparently, rapists are out of my league. FML

#3880719
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43029) - you deserved it (4375)

On 07/19/2009 at 1:11pm - misc - by adalia (woman) - United Kingdom (Barnsley)



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