lover_of_life

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Offline (the 11/02/2015 at 9:33am)

lover_of_life

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 29 April 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1358
  • Number of comments : 77
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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lover_of_life's page activity

Visits<b>mollyyy3</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 9:46am<b>kwerner7116</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 10:38pm<b>bahamit</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 1:03pm<b>worldclassrager</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 1:24pm<b>iPixiee</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 5:51pm<b>devi_916</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 5:40pm<b>moiqbal</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 4:18pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 9:35am<b>danny395</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 4:40pm<b>touch_phobia</b> - the 12/02/2013 at 3:43pm<b>haleymcaldwell</b> - the 11/18/2013 at 4:48pm<b>R3TROxLOV3</b> - the 10/18/2013 at 1:34am<b>Jeeper4Life</b> - the 08/26/2013 at 11:14pm<b>GreenDayGirl55</b> - the 08/16/2013 at 2:41pm<b>ZombieGuyCXV</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 1:55pm<b>Dracoboxer357</b> - the 04/06/2013 at 3:58pm<b>Doortje</b> - the 01/16/2011 at 12:51am<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 7:21am

Fucked!<b>moiqbal</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 10:18pm

lover_of_life's FML badges

Profile completed

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The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

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lover_of_life's favorite FMLs

Today, I slept on the plane ride home and had a scary nightmare. I started screaming in my dream, so loud that it shocked the old lady sitting next to me into screaming as well. The whole plane began laughing as we were both screaming. FML

Today, I took a nap in my car right after finishing up at work. I was woken up by a hobo sitting in the passenger seat, watching me sleep. Apparently, he'd managed to unlock the door with a wire hanger. FML

by ShelterForTheHomless / 01/13/2014 at 10:31pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the doctor, only to find out I can no longer eat chocolate, my favorite food. When I got home, my boyfriend took the chocolate cake I'd been eating from the fridge, sat down in front of me, and ate the whole thing without breaking eye contact. FML

by foreveralone / 01/12/2014 at 8:00pm / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, I was getting ready for a night out with the girls, and without any hint of trickery, just wanting an honest answer, I asked my boyfriend how I looked in the dress I chose. He immediately dropped to his knees, yelled, "NOOOOOOOOO!" and calmly left the room. FML

by -_-" / 01/11/2014 at 6:13pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, like every other day for many years, I have a phobia of bananas. This evening, the phobia came to a head when I had a nightmare in which I was stabbed to death by a gang of walking bananas. FML

by Elisa_LmR / 01/03/2014 at 6:28pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, I took an extra xanax to help with my anxiety, then went to sleep. I guess it was probably too much, because I woke up a few hours later, freaking out and panicking because I was convinced I was a bee trapped in a human body. FML

by beemove / 12/28/2013 at 4:19pm / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I was all set to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. I was ecstatic, until she threatened to "beat the fuck" out of me if I didn't make it good for her. The actual sex was 30 seconds of me being given death glares, causing me to lose my boner and have to leave in shame. FML

by :( / 09/28/2013 at 5:24pm / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend and I agreed to tell her parents that she's pregnant. When they started freaking out, instead of dealing with the situation maturely, she went into straight-up Tard Mode and said, "It's okay, I'm not the mom." FML

by yamsterr / 03/12/2012 at 12:27pm / United States / Love

Today, I was cooking and I burned my thumb. I had some first-aid burn spray, so I sprayed it on. I went outside to smoke a cigarette, and when I flicked my lighter, my thumb went up in flames. Turns out that first-aid burn spray is flammable. FML

by Anonymous / 03/07/2012 at 1:29am / United States / Health

Today, I got a text from someone I've been avoiding saying, "Can I come visit you today?" I replied, "No, sorry, I'm not home." They then replied "Then who is that in your living room?" FML

by Pookaa / 10/05/2011 at 7:48pm / United States (Maine) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was giving an anti-drugs speech to a group of ninth graders. I got onto the topic of trafficking from problem countries and asked a student to point out Mexico City on a map. He hesitated a few seconds before pointing at Canada. What the hell has the education system come to? FML

by jesus christ / 09/30/2011 at 10:55pm / United States / Kids

Today, my boyfriend still couldn't work out where my clitoris is. It's RIGHT THERE, you idiot. I've pointed it out, but each time it's like he needs a compass and a map or something. FML

by Anonymous / 09/27/2011 at 11:56am / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up next to my boss naked. We are both women and she is married. Work should be interesting tomorrow. FML

by BigBananaLover / 09/26/2011 at 2:20pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my house got watermeloned. Not egged, watermeloned. FML

by skichick54 / 08/24/2011 at 1:28am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friend sent me an online money transfer. After forgetting the password and locking myself out of my account, I had to phone up the bank and have it reset. I was prompted to answer the security question, which was "What, what?" I had to say "In the butt." to get my money. FML

by notinthebutt / 06/14/2011 at 1:57pm / United States (Minnesota) / Money