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Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML
I agree, your life sucks (107257) - you totally deserved it (27581)
On 04/02/2009 at 1:13am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML
I agree, your life sucks (113717) - you totally deserved it (11940)
On 03/22/2009 at 6:38am - intimacy - by konens_dick (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, my white mother in law called our house phone. Since I'm Chilean and have a fairly heavy accent, she mistook me for the cleaning lady and scolded me for answering the phone. Before I could correct her, she said "this is why only white people should be allowed in America" and hung up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (105001) - you totally deserved it (4045)
On 03/09/2009 at 5:14pm - misc - by bunnierabbbit - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was walking from my office to the place i had parked my car, a distance of approximately three blocks. As I was about to round the last corner I was forced to dive out of the way of a speeding car. As I looked up, I noticed that it was my car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (66348) - you totally deserved it (1782)
On 03/09/2009 at 2:35am - misc - by Chops (man) - United States (California)
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