![[fr]](http://cdn1.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_fr_hover.gif)
![[it]](http://cdn1.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_it_hover.gif)
![[es2]](http://cdn1.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_es2_hover.gif)
![[tr]](http://cdn2.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_tr_hover.gif)
![[de]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_de_hover.gif)
![[ru]](http://cdn2.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_ru_hover.gif)
![[se]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_se_hover.gif)
About love47 : :) im mostly happy but if you annymee im nott loll
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was sitting beside a very cute girl on a 3 hour bus trip with my class. She fell asleep, head on my lap. She woke up because my erection was jabbing her in the cheek. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45530) - you deserved it (20388)
On 03/28/2011 at 4:13pm - intimacy - by dickface - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I went to see a famous rapper perform. My girlfriend got us up to the front to get pictures with him. He went to give me a high-five, I thought it was a fist-bump, so I made a fist. So he made a fist while I made a palm to match his retracted high-five. Then I panicked, cupped his fist and ran. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8327) - you deserved it (18423)
On 11/26/2010 at 10:43am - misc - by blackitalian - United States
Today, when I got home, I went into my room to find a Bratz doll and a Ken doll laying naked, on top of each other on my bed. Attached to them was a note that stated, "Please, use your imagination and find other ways besides porn to get excited. The computer keeps getting viruses. Love, Mom." FML
I agree, your life sucks (13067) - you deserved it (35608)
On 11/21/2010 at 6:43pm - intimacy - by sydysyd (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was walking with and hugging my girlfriend at the same time. I tried to be funny and touched her breast, saying "Boob" in a silly voice. In reply, she slapped me in the crotch, saying "Dick" in the same voice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6511) - you deserved it (43379)
On 11/21/2010 at 3:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Mexico (Morelos)
Today, I was putting my 2 year old to bed, and I began to sing to her. She reached up, put her finger over my lips, and said, "Shhh, Mommy." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29520) - you deserved it (9540)
Today, the waiter farted while I was on a date. My date thought it was me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21202) - you deserved it (1782)
On 11/13/2010 at 12:13am - misc - by tmac05 - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex for the first time. He got on the bed on all fours and crawled towards me, saying "My precious... my precious" in Gollum's voice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30389) - you deserved it (5206)
On 11/09/2010 at 9:10pm - intimacy - by single (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I am 3 months pregnant. While lying on the couch with morning sickness, my boyfriend farted loudly and filled the room with a smell so horrifying that I immediately threw up all over my coffee table. He spent the next 20 minutes texting his friends about this "epic" moment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29864) - you deserved it (5186)
On 11/09/2010 at 1:32pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I took my four year old son to the playground. When it was time to go, he squirmed out of my arms back to the jungle gym. Not being the type of mother to put up with bad behavior, I swatted his rear and told him we had to go. That's when I realized I'd just spanked the wrong child who was wearing the same coat as my son. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9942) - you deserved it (30490)
On 11/05/2010 at 1:29pm - kids - by lilmamma - United States (California)
Today, I was so lonely that I had a 3 hour conversation with a one-legged cricket I found in my room. I'm keeping him. He has a name. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23883) - you deserved it (7944)
On 11/03/2010 at 12:39am - misc - by nk (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I was cashier at work. The line came to a stop, but there was still people there. I kept saying next, but no one moved. I finally looked over the counter where there was a lady who had been standing there the whole time. She was a midget. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26150) - you deserved it (8962)
On 11/02/2010 at 2:20am - work - by saraleerocha - Sent from mobile version
Today, I drove to the hospital to see my newborn. I went to the room, picked him out of the crate and held him. Then I heard the toilet flush and saw a woman who I didn't know come out. She screamed. My wife was in the room next door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18561) - you deserved it (6788)
On 11/01/2010 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, a girl I like came over to my house because I'd promised to help her prepare for a maths test. My mom thought it would be funny to put a stack of porn magazines and handcuffs on the table in my room when I went to open the door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25466) - you deserved it (2828)
On 11/01/2010 at 11:10am - intimacy - by crazy_mom (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I came. She got pissed and slapped me really hard for cumming inside her because she didnt want to get pregnant. 1. I was wearing a condom. 2. Shes on the pill. 3. We were having anal sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49398) - you deserved it (6481)
On 10/31/2010 at 9:30am - intimacy - by Tai - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I got very drunk after being fired from my job. In my depressed, intoxicated state, I posted my facebook status as 'Goodbye world'. The only response was from my dad saying 'cya'. His comment got 29 likes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30738) - you deserved it (8512)
On 10/23/2010 at 9:15am - misc - by drunkfacebookuser (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
