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loser

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 17 October 1992 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 110624
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About loser : I'm a loser

loser's page activity

Visits<b>papashaan</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 7:20pm<b>zeriously95</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 10:53am<b>loeramariah</b> - the 03/02/2014 at 11:15pm<b>reneetlovesyou</b> - the 01/18/2014 at 2:16pm<b>gudnylol</b> - the 03/23/2013 at 10:47am<b>iam808014</b> - the 02/08/2011 at 2:10pm<b>Twinmill</b> - the 12/18/2009 at 11:29pm<b>kayla_f_babyyy</b> - the 12/02/2009 at 11:47am<b>Meizlizard</b> - the 11/01/2009 at 3:01pm<b>chveya</b> - the 10/19/2009 at 10:11pm<b>bunnyy</b> - the 10/11/2009 at 4:53am<b>mari0958</b> - the 08/14/2009 at 7:07pm<b>jdisher</b> - the 07/02/2009 at 7:06pm<b>blacktiger123</b> - the 06/07/2009 at 2:45pm<b>hoshica</b> - the 06/04/2009 at 3:46pm<b>pyromaniac239</b> - the 06/01/2009 at 12:14pm<b>depinaariana</b> - the 05/31/2009 at 11:49am<b>nokiac_b</b> - the 05/31/2009 at 11:16am

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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

loser's favorite FMLs

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

#527227
518 comments

I agree, your life sucks (239722) - you deserved it (31629)

On 03/22/2009 at 6:38am - intimacy - by konens_dick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I went swimming. As I was getting out of the very crowded pool a little girl ran up to me pointed and yelled, "Mommy, I want big boobies like that when I grow up." I'm 16. I'm a boy. FML

#522932
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71435) - you deserved it (23236)

On 03/22/2009 at 12:15am - misc - by joshinbaltimore (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went out for coffee with a guy I really like. We met up at the local café, and decided to sit at a counter in front of the window. We talked and flirted for a while. Then he kissed me, and while he was kissing me someone banged on the window. It was my parents. They didn't know I'm gay. FML

#520285
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (90299) - you deserved it (32879)

On 03/21/2009 at 10:38pm - love - by clementine_k (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was on a cruise and fell asleep next to the pool. I had an intense dream that I had fallen off into the ocean. I rolled off my sun chair into the water and woke up screaming uncontrollably, I thought I was in the ocean. I was in the kiddy pool. FML

#516952
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52939) - you deserved it (11944)

On 03/21/2009 at 8:06pm - misc - by nick (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got hypnotized in front of my entire school. Once I was hypnotized the guy told me that the hottest celebrity in the world was in the audience and then he told me to point out who I saw. I said I saw Mick Jagger. I'm a guy. FML

#500940
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63153) - you deserved it (9363)

On 03/20/2009 at 11:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was pulled over by my father who is a police officer. He was training a rookie and gave me a breathalyzer test to show his trainee how to do it. I blew a .15 and was taken to jail. FML

#483516
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33519) - you deserved it (134407)

On 03/20/2009 at 1:48am - misc - by Jesse (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, after sex with my girlfriend, I thought it would be sexy to wear her underwear until we saw each other again. I found a pair in her bathroom, but they definitely weren't her sexy ones. Her mom walked in on me to collect the laundry and screeched "What are you doing with my panties!" FML

#483227
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14530) - you deserved it (94053)

On 03/20/2009 at 1:37am - intimacy - by HughGorgy (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to the dentist. He asked me to lean my head closer to him so he could get a better look at my teeth. He was hard. FML

#481871
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (99786) - you deserved it (5614)

On 03/20/2009 at 12:33am - misc - by rmb131 (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I had just reached in my purse without looking to grab a granola bar when my boss walked in my office. We talked for a few minutes as he kept giving me strange looks and looking at my hand. He left and I realized I hadn't taken a granola bar out, but a tampon instead. FML

#464994
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19571) - you deserved it (42880)

On 03/19/2009 at 12:41pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend at his college and when I walked into the dorm he was lying in his bed with another girl. When he saw me he simply said, "April Fool's!" It's March 19th. FML

#461201
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (137865) - you deserved it (8542)

On 03/19/2009 at 3:40am - intimacy - by cmerr (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend and I were at his house having sex. After about 30 minutes, his mom came home and was knocking on the door asking "What are you doing?" Thinking I might have a chance to sneak out, I got dressed real quiet. Then my boyfriend answers, "Zoe. I'm doing Zoe." FML

#459925
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (81935) - you deserved it (14994)

On 03/19/2009 at 2:05am - intimacy - by Zoe123 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to my friend's house. While she went to the kitchen, I noticed a little pink pastry on her desk. It looked really good, so I decided to take a bite before she got back. As I bit into it, a sizzling noise started, and foam overflowed in my mouth. It was a bath bomb. FML

#458793
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9863) - you deserved it (89756)

On 03/19/2009 at 1:09am - misc - by skywayavenue (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was leaving to go over to a friend's and my parents suddenly ask if I'm gay. I reply that no, I'm bisexual. My mom then asks if I've ever made out with someone of the same sex and I say yes. She turns to my dad and says 'I told you so. You owe me $20'. My parents bet on my sexuality. FML

#446324
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (99701) - you deserved it (24742)

On 03/18/2009 at 6:42pm - love - by Syferix (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was at a Chinese restaurant, I'd forgotten my glasses and had a migraine. I was straining my eyes, squinting and rubbing my temples to alleviate my migraine. I was kicked out of the restaurant and banned henceforth because my waitress thought I was mocking her eyes. FML



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  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

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