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About losanimal : I only want females ta kno shit about me, so hit me a danielnormore25@gmail.com
Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
Today, at my job as a cashier, a very old man came through my checkout. His purchase consisted of a box of condoms and a can of whipped cream. The creepy smile he gave me has scarred me for life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27684) - you deserved it (3252)
On 01/31/2011 at 4:23pm - intimacy - by yournick (woman) - Canada (Nova Scotia)
Today, I was at a power lifting meet when a girl I really liked walked in. Trying to impress her, I increased my bench to 350, when I have only done 300 before. She then watched me drop it on my chest, breaking my breast bone, and also crying in the process. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8809) - you deserved it (47428)
On 01/29/2011 at 7:35pm - love - by wowimdumb (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I got my wisdom teeth cut out. While my girlfriend was driving me home, I, still being high on the laughing gas, accidentally admitted to cheating on her. She was kind enough to wait until the numbness wore off before she punched me in the face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5688) - you deserved it (70355)
On 01/28/2011 at 8:06pm - love - by peeoncarl1111 - United States
Today, I got pulled over by a cop. Since my window wasn't working, I opened the door, causing him to run towards me with a drawn gun. He then had a go at me with his night stick. After realizing my window was broken, he laughed and let me off with a warning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22254) - you deserved it (2638)
On 01/28/2011 at 10:43am - misc - by NotoriousSRJ (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my 14 year old son got suspended and I had to pay for the damage after he sprayed "FUCK THE POLICE" on the back wall of his school. I'm a policeman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28716) - you deserved it (6373)
On 01/28/2011 at 9:25am - kids - by duckthehack (man) - Poland (Wielkopolskie)
Today, my roommate decided to prank me by leaving a fake suicide note on the bathroom door and lying motionless in a bathtub full of water and red coloring. When I went, horrified, to take a closer look, he lunged at me and screamed. I was so scared I pissed myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35266) - you deserved it (4109)
On 01/27/2011 at 11:35pm - misc - by Scaredwitless (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, as I was walking home, I passed some little girls who threw a bunch of snowballs at me. I dodged every single one, ran away laughing, and gave them the finger. I then ran into a snowman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8793) - you deserved it (29708)
On 01/27/2011 at 12:19am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I met my boyfriend's brother. When he saw me, he whispered into my boyfriend's ear, "So, this is your bitch eh? Nice!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (20509) - you deserved it (3969)
On 01/26/2011 at 7:57pm - intimacy - by PLU (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was dumped. I ran home and cried and ranted on and on to my mother. After about 10 minutes of talking, she threw a book at my face and said, "No wonder he dumped you! You can't shut up!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (19072) - you deserved it (10129)
On 01/26/2011 at 8:26am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I found out my boyfriend of 5 years has been cheating on me with a Realtor. The same Realtor who helped me sell my condo so I could move in with my boyfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20776) - you deserved it (1765)
On 01/25/2011 at 1:10am - intimacy - by raaquel - United States
Today, my mum told me how I was only here because my dad couldn't pull out in time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30682) - you deserved it (2300)
On 01/22/2011 at 5:03am - intimacy - by Theaccident (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, at the end of another long workday, my husband announced that he was going to take a shower. Attempting to rekindle some much needed romance in our lives, I seductively asked him, "Want me to join you?" He replied, "Sure. But first I have to poop." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20549) - you deserved it (4614)
On 01/22/2011 at 12:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend and he was fingering me. After he left, my mum says to me "I wish my sex life was as interesting as yours." She had walked in and we hadn't even noticed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24158) - you deserved it (8373)
On 01/20/2011 at 4:39am - intimacy - by saddened97 (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, after work, I came home to my boyfriend sleeping on the couch. Feeling romantic, I started to undo his pants. My reward was him waking up and kneeing me in the eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9679) - you deserved it (15940)
On 01/15/2011 at 12:52am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I had a panic attack because my boyfriend thought it would be sexy to choke me in the middle of sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28851) - you deserved it (3961)
On 01/09/2011 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
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