Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

lonewolf393

Offline (12 hours ago) | Search for a member

lonewolf393

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 21 March 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 675
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

lonewolf393's page activity

Visits<b>cherrio27</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 11:59pm<b>stingray112</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 1:10pm<b>wsws69</b> - the 02/06/2014 at 10:16pm

Liked!<b>cherrio27</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 9:10pm

lonewolf393's FML badges

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

See all of lonewolf393's badges

lonewolf393's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I tried roleplaying a teacher-student during sex. We're both studying to be actors, so we ended up going into a really deep, emotional storyline that didn't end in sex at all. FML

#21284275
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21428) - you deserved it (5848)

On 10/24/2014 at 6:54am - intimacy - by too good - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I got in an argument with my teacher for always comparing me to my sister that she had a few years before. After I said, "I'm not my sister so please stop comparing me to her," she responded, "Of course you're not your sister, I actually like your sister." FML

#21283210
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27517) - you deserved it (4102)

On 10/22/2014 at 4:55pm - misc - by Not so much of a teachers pet - United States

Today, my 17-year-old son managed to easily convince my 13-year-old daughter that if you have sex before getting married, you'll instantly get horrible diseases that will kill you. Her freaking out is how I found out she's not only gullible as hell, but sexually active as well. FML

#21283066
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33978) - you deserved it (4190)

On 10/22/2014 at 12:09pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, my son gave me a bottle of shampoo for my birthday. I'm as bald as a coot. FML

#21282364
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27372) - you deserved it (2642)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:41am - kids - by Bald (man) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, I volunteered to tutor a 17-year-old girl in science. I had to explain in detail of what the real Big Bang theory was, as she only knew about the show. Later, I heard I was reported by her because apparently, "I was trying to convert her to Scientology." I now know why she needed a tutor. FML

Today, my boss drove past me while I was walking to work, and splashing mud over my uniform. When I got to work, he criticized me for showing up in unpresentable condition. FML

#21281679
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33213) - you deserved it (2396)

On 10/20/2014 at 11:03am - work - by Chansus10 - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was leading a tour of my university and saw a girl in ripped jeans and combat boots smoking a cigarette. I told her that she shouldn't be representing the school in such a manner. She shot back: "I'm a Presidential Scholar. Suck my dick, bitch." FML

#21278356
310 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25272) - you deserved it (50374)

On 10/15/2014 at 1:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, my friends and I went paintballing. The instructor showed us the sound of an unloaded gun by shooting at my face. It wasn't unloaded. FML

#21277056
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43060) - you deserved it (2950)

On 10/13/2014 at 5:33pm - health - by clumsylobster - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my laziness reached a whole new level when I caught myself skipping the longer FML stories to read the shorter ones. FML

#21272079
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29428) - you deserved it (11518)

On 10/06/2014 at 3:12pm - misc - by eh - Azerbaijan (Baki)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my vagina. He replied, "What's that?" FML

#21271608
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35259) - you deserved it (15780)

On 10/05/2014 at 10:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was flipping out because I couldn't find my wallet, and after several hours of cussing myself out, I went downstairs to make breakfast. I poured cereal into my bowl and my wallet flopped out with the Honey Nut Cheerios. I need to stop drinking. FML

#21267969
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22586) - you deserved it (33269)

On 09/29/2014 at 10:13pm - misc - by KasSmoke - United States (Texas)

Today, I came home to a half-shaved dog and a laughing third grader. FML

#21267339
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32232) - you deserved it (3423)

On 09/28/2014 at 11:00pm - kids - by Anonymoose - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was asked to order a new lockable cash tin for work. When my boss returned to ask which one I'd selected, I said, "An 8-inch black one". Her giggle said it all. FML

#21265697
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30822) - you deserved it (5758)

On 09/26/2014 at 9:03am - work - by dicksonthebrain (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, we had a meeting at my job and we had to introduce new ideas to our boss. Earlier, I was talking to one of my close friends who also attended the meeting about my idea. As we start the meeting, she decides to steal my idea and take complete credit for it. My boss loves "her" idea. FML

#21265023
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36476) - you deserved it (5811)

On 09/25/2014 at 8:18am - work - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I learned that even though a woman has a baby carriage and seems friendly, she won't be afraid to mug you in front of her kid. FML

#21262985
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34813) - you deserved it (2866)

On 09/22/2014 at 6:58am - health - by deathstar3548 (man) - United States (Florida)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: