Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

lonerftl

Search for a member

lonerftl
  • Town/Country : Toronto, Canada
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 17336
  • Number of comments : 111
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About lonerftl : I'm Oliver. Please to meet you or not depends on the situation.
Take care now, bye bye then.

lonerftl's last visitors

Hilda_xFreezeGubiithefishlmc94fLYinGgoOsE360analosugarnspiceesarah_luvieallison00prettypink786

lonerftl's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

lonerftl's favorite FMLs

Today, I went shopping with my new "It's true, I'm a Ninja" shirt on. Suddenly an apple comes and hits me right in the eye. A little boy runs up to me, yells "You aren't a Ninja! A Ninja would have caught that!", and runs off. FML

#13756412
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18855) - you deserved it (56871)

On 11/07/2010 at 8:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML

#9110965
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37257) - you deserved it (8008)

On 03/15/2010 at 7:22pm - love - by Satan (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I had one more gift to buy: a copy of Fight Club. I asked a person working at Best Buy if they had any in stock. The man wouldn't sell me the last copy because I had broken the first two rules. FML

#6923345
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21518) - you deserved it (9509)

On 12/24/2009 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I had a long, meaningful telephone conversation. After hanging up, I realized I hadn't had such a great conversation in a long time. Who was it with? The Dell Customer Support guy. FML

#5081613
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29799) - you deserved it (4747)

On 09/06/2009 at 1:27pm - misc - by asdfjkl (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend getting it on with the neighbour's daughter. As soon as he saw me, he started singing 'It Wasn't Me' by Shaggy, completely naked, still sitting with the girl. FML

#4933603
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51915) - you deserved it (4130)

On 08/30/2009 at 5:26pm - love - by shaggy (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years and I decided to have sex for the first time. When we were in the room, finally ready to start, she confessed that she had never seen a penis before. To make her more comfortable, I showed her mine. At the sight of it, well, she actually fainted. FML

#2182938
381 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80060) - you deserved it (9814)

On 05/22/2009 at 3:50pm - intimacy - by herve (man) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. He knows that I love when he breaths on my neck. When I was about to finish he put his lips a millimeter away from my neck/ear and breathed, "I love how you smell like my grandmother's house." FML

#946038
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (90543) - you deserved it (6643)

On 04/13/2009 at 8:07am - intimacy - by bodyelectric (woman) - United States

Today, I decided to clean my room, find a job and ask a girl on a date. I ended up playing video games online. FML

#1399
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8188) - you deserved it (37339)

On 01/16/2009 at 6:19pm - misc - by Noname - Canada (British Columbia)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: