About lolmyendoff456 : Hey :D how's it going? Well I love meeting new people so feel free to message me :)
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lolmyendoff456's favorite FMLs
Today, I went to a carnival. While walking around with my cousin, I saw a one hundred dollar bill on the ground. Just before I stepped on it, a man grabbed it. His words? "Don't you just hate it when that happens?" And he walked away. FML
by bubblezzz123 / 09/04/2009 at 2:41pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, my brother's best friend spent the night and was changing with the door partially open. He's super hot and as I was watching him change, he sneezed. Forgetting he didn't know I was watching him, I said bless you. He called me a freak, slammed the door in my face and told my parents. FML
by jeeperspeepers / 08/02/2009 at 6:03pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend of 5 years admitted why his pet name for me is "his beautiful swan". Apparently, the first few years we were dating, he and his friends secretly referred to me as "the ugly duckling" because my sister was so much hotter. FML
by Anonymous / 07/09/2009 at 1:50pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML
by pinkrazrgirl247 / 07/03/2009 at 2:29am / United States / Love
Today, my girlfriend left me. The reason? She's not actually a lesbian. She has been using our relationship to piss off her conservative parents. We've been together for over a year, and I've been in love with her for over five. FML
by heart-broken / 07/02/2009 at 9:33pm / Australia (Victoria) / Love
Today, I went into work to waitress on a table of 40 guests. They were my only table for the day and the bill came to over 700 dollars. After they left the busser was cleaning the table and threw out the credit card receipt which had my tip on it. FML
by Anonymous / 06/28/2009 at 2:43pm / United States (New York) / Money
by Jeweler / 06/26/2009 at 2:13am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I decided I would eat healthy in order to lose weight. Feeling powerful, I threw away all of the icecream in my freezer. An hour later, I picked the icecream carton out of the garbage and ate the entire half-melted carton. FML
by Anonymous / 05/09/2009 at 10:48am / United States (Illinois) / Health
by htothecr / 05/03/2009 at 5:05pm / United States (Maine) / Miscellaneous
Today, while at the Golden Gate Bridge, I spotted a large group of Asians trying to take a picture. Trying to help, I slowly say, "You... want me... take picture?" while using hand motions. The man looks at me and says, "No thanks asshole, I got it," in plain English. FML
by Tourist / 03/26/2009 at 3:19am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my older brother and some of his cute friends came over. When we got inside my mom yells to me "I got you some bigger tampons because you leaked all over your new underwear." They all started laughing. FML
by megan228 / 03/20/2009 at 5:16pm / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy
by KAAALIS / 03/15/2009 at 10:20pm / United States (New York) / Love
Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML
by thatsucks / 02/28/2009 at 6:10am / United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire) / Love
- Today, a car almost hit me. Since I wasn’t hurt, the driver chased me with a baseball bat to finish… Today, at Toronto airport, the customs officer checked my passport, then called his colleagues to… Today, I threw up when I got home because I'd been drinking with friends. My parents asked what was…