About lolmyendoff456 : Hey :D how's it going? Well I love meeting new people so feel free to message me :)
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lolmyendoff456's favorite FMLs
Today, while walking home from work, a young teenage girl ran up behind me and dumped a carton of milk on my head. She said, "The cow master baptizes you!" and then ran in the opposite direction, cackling madly. FML
by Anonymous / 07/29/2011 at 8:31pm / United States (Washington) / Health
Today, I realized that since I started working full time, the only friend I have left is my cat. Lonely and bored out of my mind, I told him about my day. He decided to end the conversation by shitting on the floor. FML
by Username / 07/29/2011 at 3:17pm / United States (South Carolina) / Animals
by oliveoyl / 07/23/2011 at 12:05am / United States (California) / Kids
Today, I went to see a movie I'd been waiting months for. A couple of women sat down a few rows in front of me with five infants. The infants cried and wailed throughout. I'm not sure I have any idea what was actually said in any of the dialogue. FML
by AceGeek / 07/22/2011 at 7:49pm / United States (California) / Kids
by coffee girl / 07/22/2011 at 4:31pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/22/2011 at 2:29am / United States (Texas) / Love
by Courtney / 07/21/2011 at 5:54am / United States / Transportation
by Username / 07/20/2011 at 7:07pm / United States / Love
by cheddar / 07/20/2011 at 6:17pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by freakfreak12345 / 07/19/2011 at 12:41pm / United States (Maine) / Animals
Today, while I was showering, my brother thought it would be funny to burst through the door pretending he was a burglar. Panicked, I went to grab the soap bar as a weapon, slipped, fell and hit my head on the faucet. FML
by MAWZ / 07/19/2011 at 2:33am / United States (Colorado) / Health
Today, a group of girl-scouts came to my door selling chocolate bars. I bought 2 bars and smiled as they left, thinking I'd done a good deed. When the door closed, I heard one of the girls say, "Told you, the fat bitches always wanna buy from us." FML
by hatemylife / 07/19/2011 at 2:24am / United States (New York) / Kids
by KidCudi227 / 07/19/2011 at 1:42am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at a restaurant with my son when he started to choke on his food. Panicked, I grabbed the closest drink I could reach and made him gulp it down. Only when I received tons of dirty looks from people at other tables did I realize I had given him beer. My son is 8. FML
by stargirl / 07/18/2011 at 8:36pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
by _TaToRtOt_ / 07/18/2011 at 9:08am / United States (Virginia) / Money
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…