Open mindedness is my deal. I write the most inane AIM away messages. I can't stand internet tough guys and dumb arguments (religion, who's better: MJ or Kobe?, this band sucks because..., etc.,.) I'm a business major. I want to go to NYU Stern School of Business someday.
Today, I planned a romantic dinner with rose petals, the whole lot, for my ex-girlfriend to win her back. When I took her to my house I told her to guess what I had planned, to which she replied "I hope it's not a stupid romantic dinner with rose petals and shit." FML
I agree, your life sucks (36119) - you totally deserved it (7931)
On 06/29/2009 at 2:31am - love - by ipopnlok (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, the cable repairman came to fix my cable which has never worked well. The entire time he was talking about how much extra money he got the "fat bitch who moved here 6 months ago" to pay for her cable. I moved in 6 months ago. I was pregnant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38176) - you totally deserved it (1488)
On 06/28/2009 at 8:44pm - misc - by fmerunning (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I had my first kiss standing in front of my front door. It was really cute, the way you normally think about first kisses. When I got inside, I realized my mom had been watching out her second story bedroom window taking pictures. She put them on Facebook captioned 'My baby's first kiss!' FML
I agree, your life sucks (55474) - you totally deserved it (2666)
On 06/28/2009 at 11:53am - misc - by steven (man) - Cayman Islands
Today, it's been a few days since I decided to give this girl I like the silent treatment.I've been writing on/off with her for a few weeks, but decided to stop a bit, to seem mysterious. When I logged on Facebook today, her status was "..is so happy that annoying guy has stopped writing to me!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (11241) - you totally deserved it (37460)
On 06/27/2009 at 5:11pm - love - by jake (man) - Denmark (Frederiksborg)
Today, at the airport, my mom began talking about how useless the war in Iraq was, and how dumb the soldiers that serve there were for enlisting during the war. The soldier at the vending machine near us's eyes met mine. I mouthed, "Sorry." and he mouthed, slowly, "You fuckin' better be.". FML
I agree, your life sucks (42986) - you totally deserved it (7941)
On 06/26/2009 at 3:57am - misc - by ILuvYouSoldiers (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I worked up the courage to comment on my crush's picture. I wrote "Cool picture" on his facebook profile picture. Pleased with myself, I later logged on to see if he had replied. He had. Well, at least he took the time to reply- "Who the fuck are you?". FML
I agree, your life sucks (37420) - you totally deserved it (6541)
On 05/22/2009 at 3:27pm - love - by Invisible (woman) - Switzerland (Basel-Stadt)
Today, I was visiting my sick grandmother in the hospital when my cousin and I were playing in some empty wheelchairs. After goofing off I said, "They're fun, but I would kill myself if I was in a wheelchair." A little boy rounded the corner and said, "Tell me about it." He was in a wheelchair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6146) - you totally deserved it (45840)
On 05/21/2009 at 5:48am - misc - by boyo (man) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I was taking a final exam and I reached into my pocket to get out a pencil. I felt this thing in my pocket so I got it out and put it on the desk. At first I thought it was a leaf but then it started kicking and trying to run around. It was a cockroach. It had been living in my pocket. FML
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On 05/21/2009 at 1:36am - misc - by GrahamCracker (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I had my high school reunion. The nerdy guy that I picked on all 4 years had married a Swedish supermodel, then divorced her for a Brazilian supermodel. My girlfriend works at 7-11. Karma sucks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7097) - you totally deserved it (96174)
On 05/17/2009 at 4:16pm - misc - by karmasabitch (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I had a very intense sexual dream that made me come and left me panting when I woke up. It was the best orgasm I'd ever had. The trouble was, it wasn't about a hot girl, or anything sexy. It was about bacon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (87911) - you totally deserved it (18897)
On 05/17/2009 at 8:33am - intimacy - by wtfdreams (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was shopping at a supermarket. As I was about to pay for my items, I noticed the cashier was very cute. Trying to be nice, I smiled. She smiled back and said "Hello, how are you?" Instead of saying 'I'm good' or "I'm okay", I said "I'm gay". FML
I agree, your life sucks (38647) - you totally deserved it (13856)
On 05/16/2009 at 5:13am - misc - by UncleRory (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I took a call. Wrong number. A few seconds later, they called back and I told her that she had the wrong number. She said she just hit redial and didn't understand how she got me again. I tried to explain how redial works. She called me a moron and hung up. Then my phone rang again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57546) - you totally deserved it (1984)
On 05/12/2009 at 1:39pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I woke up at 4:30am because I forgot to turn my Blackberry off 'loud'. I woke up to find an email from my ex-boyfriend's crazy mother who had sent me pictures of her son's wedding that had happened over the weekend. I am still single. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40534) - you totally deserved it (2283)
On 05/12/2009 at 9:09am - misc - by freckle82 - Canada (Ontario)
Today, a friend and I went to Gamestop to pick up a game he wanted. I ended up buying a 17+ game, and I was prepared to show my license, but he stopped me an said, "I know you're 18". He then said, "Man, I've pretty much watched you grow up in this store." A game salesman watched me grow up. FML
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On 05/12/2009 at 7:09am - misc - by Rech (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I decided I didn't care about my pride, and so I asked this girl out in a text. After an hour of no responce I asked again. Later I got a text saying, "I'm sorry, This is Emily's mom. Emily isn't here at the moment, but if I were you, I wouldn't ask again." I was rejected by her mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37664) - you totally deserved it (9839)
On 05/11/2009 at 9:25pm - love - by ConnorFails (man) - United States (New Jersey)
