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  • Title : Miss
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  • Number of visits : 3551
  • Number of comments : 183
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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lol_ironic_life's page activity

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Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 3:15pm

lol_ironic_life's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.


You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of lol_ironic_life's badges

lol_ironic_life's favorite FMLs

Today, while mowing the lawn, I was attacked by an underground hornet nest. I now have many stings, two scared dogs, and a mower still running outside. The hornets are swarming it and some are sitting on the lever, as if to turn it off. It's like they know. FML

by Anonymous / 10/17/2012 at 4:08pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally realized how depressed I am when I found bubble wrap and didn't feel like popping it. FML

by Epiphany / 07/19/2012 at 5:01am / United States / Health

Today, I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl, so I put an extra 30 pounds on the bar, I lowered, pushed... and pooped. FML

by authorsubmit / 05/04/2012 at 8:49am / United States / Health

Today, a repairman came to fix my couch, which is under warranty because the frame had broken in multiple places. To ensure I got a new couch out of the deal, I stabbed multiple holes into the cushion. The guy fixed the frame, but said there was nothing he could do about lacerations on the sofa. FML

by grovage / 05/02/2012 at 8:43pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

by Anonymous / 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was cuddling with my girlfriend, she looked at me and leaned in. Thinking she was going to kiss me, I leaned too. Just as we were about to kiss, she screamed "COW KISSES" and somehow managed to lick my eyeball. FML

by Brian / 03/17/2012 at 10:32pm / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, while making my daily offering of turd to the porcelain throne, I took out my phone and started playing a game. I suddenly felt a tickling sensation on my leg, and I freaked out as I saw hundreds of ants had emerged from behind the toilet. FML

by Anonymous / 03/04/2012 at 5:20pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous

Today, I discovered how startling it is to wake up by having your cat springboard off your face. The intended prey? Two fornicating geckos on the ceiling. FML

by JukeboxValkyrie / 02/16/2012 at 2:52am / United States (Florida) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was attacked by a bird at 3 in the morning. The bird was being attacked by an owl, and decided the safest place to land wasn't in a tree, but my face. No-one will believe me, despite the 12 stitches across my face. FML

by Anonymous / 02/08/2012 at 12:45pm / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was on the toilet, my cat managed to climb up behind me, slip and then grip itself to my bare ass. In my haste to get away from the cat, I pooped on the toilet without noticing. Until I sat back down. FML

by Anonymous / 02/01/2012 at 1:13am / Canada / Animals

Today, I found out that Google+ has been automatically uploading my cell phone pictures as I take them. My friends have now seen pictures of me, my penis, and other things too horrifying to talk about. FML

by brannie / 01/29/2012 at 7:26pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out why my room-mates and I have been ill for the past week. Apparently a rodent climbed into our water cooker and died. I have been drinking tea and eating noodles that have been tainted by a corpse all this time. FML

by hannaaaahr / 01/11/2012 at 3:08pm / Netherlands (Utrecht) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I decided to write a romantic email to my boyfriend describing how much I love and miss him. An hour later, I got an email back saying, "I think we need to discuss this." It seems I sent it to my teacher by mistake. FML

by mjbx / 01/01/2012 at 2:02pm / United Kingdom (Peterborough) / Love

Today, I was woken up early in the morning by the sound of my mother frantically crying out for help. Apparently she had tried, unsuccessfully, to "end the suffering" of an injured squirrel by drowning it in the toilet. How? By placing it into the bowl and smothering it with clothes. My clothes. FML

by Anonymous / 12/21/2011 at 1:06pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML