About lizzlegirl : life is a beach n im just playin in the sand.
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lizzlegirl's favorite FMLs
by K123 / 06/06/2011 at 1:22am / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, at my job as a lifeguard, the kids in the pool decided to start a new game. The game involved spreading out to different parts of the pool and pretending to be drowning at the same time. Whoever was "saved" first, won. FML
by zain / 06/04/2011 at 2:15am / United States (Texas) / Work
by meyo555 / 06/02/2011 at 5:45am / United States (Nebraska) / Health
by moe / 05/27/2011 at 1:26am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I received a friend request on Facebook from my biological father, who I have never met in my life. As I was scrolling through his hobbies and interests, I saw "Drinking," "Black women with big asses," and "Getting laid, lol." FML
by Anonymous / 05/25/2011 at 4:33pm / Canada (New Brunswick) / Intimacy
by Devon / 05/19/2011 at 9:38pm / United States (Vermont) / Miscellaneous
Today, it's been 5 years I've been working for a man that won't admit he has Tourette's. He sits at his desk, twitching his head and hissing like a snake. He's also randomly said things like 'nipples', 'Jessica Simpson', 'potato peeler', etc. I feel like it's become my job to warn new employees. FML
by ShakeRattleHiss / 04/20/2011 at 11:25am / Canada (Ontario) / Work
by HWS / 04/15/2011 at 1:47am / Canada (British Columbia) / Health
by Anonymous / 04/14/2011 at 1:49am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by ILiveWithMorons / 04/11/2011 at 11:07pm / United States (Virginia) / Health
by blehhx / 04/09/2011 at 1:32am / United States / Animals
Today, Amazon didn't deliver the present I bought my mother for Mothering Sunday, so she called me an 'Ungrateful bastard.' And about half an hour ago, I cut my thumb whilst making her lunch. She said, 'You're doing this on purpose so I feel sorry for you. Well I don't.' FML
by Trainspotting / 04/03/2011 at 9:32am / United Kingdom (Staffordshire) / Miscellaneous
Today, I joked with my dad, saying I'd gotten my boyfriend pregnant. In response, he slapped me, threw my phone across the room, smashed my laptop, and then took a moment for what I'd said to sink in. FML
by rowie1311 / 03/27/2011 at 2:09pm / United Kingdom (Northamptonshire) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm / United Kingdom (Wiltshire) / Geek
by Ldp56 / 02/25/2011 at 1:44pm / United States (New York) / Kids
- Today, I was trying to convince my flatmate to agree to let me get us a kitten. After gushing about… Today, it's the five year anniversary of the day I broke up with my girlfriend to see other people.… Today, I realized I get more pleasure from a tampon than my boyfriend I have been having sex with…