About lizzlegirl : life is a beach n im just playin in the sand.
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Today, I was talking dirty with someone on the phone, when at one point I said, "Oh yeah, you like that?" She responded, "I can't actually feel anything you know, we're just on the phone." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8419) - you deserved it (21052)
On 01/25/2012 at 12:00am - intimacy - by talkingtoaretard (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was talking dirty with someone on the phone, when at one point I said, "Oh yeah, you like that?" She responded, "I can't actually feel anything you know, we're just on the phone." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8419) - you deserved it (21052)
On 01/25/2012 at 12:00am - intimacy - by talkingtoaretard (man) - United States (California)
Today, I received a letter from the state saying my 14-year-old daughter is now legally recognized as a male. I have no idea what happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35911) - you deserved it (3355)
Today, I came across a picture of my grandpa taking a hit off a bong, while wearing nothing but a Playboy shirt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18633) - you deserved it (2802)
On 01/09/2012 at 1:53pm - misc - by mortifiedgrandchild - United States (Florida)
Today, my older brother burst into my bedroom at 4 am to show me photos of sushi. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21179) - you deserved it (2003)
On 01/02/2012 at 8:18am - misc - by jku (man) - United States (Montana)
Today, a friend told me over MSN that her father had died. Trying to express some solidarity, I went to send her a tearful smiley. I accidentally sent her the dancing pig animation instead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14332) - you deserved it (18824) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, my parents were coming to visit me at my brand new apartment. I made dinner and served them the cake my roomate had left for me in the fridge. Thirty minutes after they left, I was so baked that I couldn't think straight. I still don't know if my parents made it home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24571) - you deserved it (6910)
On 12/22/2011 at 1:11pm - misc - by Cookie (woman) - South Africa
Today, my boyfriend left me for my neighbor. Her name is Hope. She'd better "hope" I don't take a dump in her yard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20078) - you deserved it (12882)
On 12/09/2011 at 9:48pm - misc - by queenlatifa101bebe (woman) - United States
Today, I went to a concert. Being 6'5" was a great advantage because I could see the stage from wherever I was stood. On the downside, I was used by people as a meeting point. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22092) - you deserved it (2612)
On 12/06/2011 at 8:01pm - misc - by jackgrant (man) - Iran Islamic Republic of
Today, I found out that if a cop asks you if you have any weapons, and you reply by saying "only these guns" while flexing your biceps, they won't take it very well. And neither will the cops down at the station. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9216) - you deserved it (31789)
On 12/06/2011 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous -
Today, my husband and I got into an argument. I tried to assault him with a laptop. He yelled, "Don't hit me with the computer." My apartment neighbor yelled through the wall, "Do what you gotta do, girl." FML
I agree, your life sucks (10938) - you deserved it (27554)
On 12/05/2011 at 9:31pm - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was casually shopping at Walmart. Everything was normal until the young guy browsing the aisle next to me suddenly approached me and whispered "sperm" into my ear. My spine has never experienced a chill like this one before. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24459) - you deserved it (2850)
On 11/30/2011 at 10:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, like every day since my birth, my name is Spreme. Yeah, you probably have trouble pronouncing it correctly too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35590) - you deserved it (2800) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, my parents told me that they've been having a contest to see who could punish me the most this week. So far, my mom is in the lead by kicking me out of the car near railroad tracks, and making me walk the 4 miles home in the freezing rain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34101) - you deserved it (2550)
On 11/03/2011 at 5:18am - misc - by Grounded (woman) - United States
Today, my dad yelled for me. It was an emergency. I ran down the stairs, tripped, fell, and limped over to my dad only to find that he wanted me to see a video of someone playing "Bohemian Rhapsody" on the ukulele. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17267) - you deserved it (1905)
On 10/29/2011 at 9:40am - misc - by camille - United States (Minnesota)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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