Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

lizzlegirl

Search for a member

lizzlegirl

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 17 December 1996 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 1672
  • Number of comments : 28
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About lizzlegirl : life is a beach n im just playin in the sand.

lizzlegirl's page activity

Visits<b>Rotarun</b> - the 06/18/2012 at 8:32pm<b>JustStella</b> - the 06/02/2012 at 1:48pm<b>Virtual_BS</b> - the 05/16/2012 at 11:26am<b>Legendslayer222</b> - the 05/15/2012 at 5:51pm<b>ICastillo</b> - the 05/15/2012 at 2:18am<b>rallets</b> - the 07/10/2011 at 2:10pm<b>ImCuteDealWithIt</b> - the 03/14/2011 at 6:30am<b>gotbiscuits</b> - the 03/13/2011 at 4:07pm<b>CaptainPickles72</b> - the 03/11/2011 at 4:19pm<b>Feverrotes</b> - the 03/09/2011 at 9:38pm

lizzlegirl's FML badges

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of lizzlegirl's badges

lizzlegirl's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my mother stroking my cat and murmuring, "Don't worry, kitty. One day, you and I... we will rule." FML

#19734981
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26815) - you deserved it (2814)

On 06/04/2012 at 8:54pm - animals - by Scared (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my 24-year-old brother tried to convince me that Hogwarts is real, because there is no way a person could have written that based on imagination. My parents agreed with him. FML

#19731019
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21141) - you deserved it (2923)

On 06/04/2012 at 3:19am - kids - by nanall - United States

Today, I had a babysitting job. When I got there, the parents were rushing out the door and told me they'd left instructions for the kids on the table. The first bullet point stated that the oldest was convinced she is possessed by the devil, but just to ignore it. Three more hours to go. FML

#19701580
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19944) - you deserved it (1063)

On 05/29/2012 at 9:55pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, I went to visit my husband's grave. I was unable to mourn in peace because some teenagers were smoking pot and talking about a government conspiracy "to change the way gravity works" on the next grave over. FML

#19696168
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32044) - you deserved it (1790)

On 05/28/2012 at 10:51pm - misc - by notnicefools - United States (California)

Today, at work, my friend dared me to answer the next call on my phone by saying, "This is your local sperm bank. You jack it, we pack it." I did it. The person on the phone was my boss. FML

#19682982
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10090) - you deserved it (39896)

On 05/26/2012 at 10:42am - intimacy - by girly girly - United States (Texas)

Today, I had dinner with my family for the first time in a couple of days. My mum and dad spent the majority of the time arguing whether salt or pepper weighed more. This is why I'm not home often. FML

#19666760
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15829) - you deserved it (1737)

On 05/23/2012 at 7:44am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML

#19631928
472 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38741) - you deserved it (3096)

On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)

Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML

#19623439
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36153) - you deserved it (3802) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm - misc - by lafinesse (woman) -

Today, I started the job of my dreams. Our first marketing meeting was an in-depth analysis of the phrase, "Haters gonna hate, potatoes gonna potate". I have a 5 year contract. FML

#19611170
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18464) - you deserved it (3825)

On 05/12/2012 at 10:36am - work - by picklet (woman) - Malaysia (Negeri Sembilan)

Today, I took a picture in front of my bathroom mirror and posted it on Facebook. When I checked it later, it had 20 comments on the picture. I was feeling good until I read the comments and looked at the picture again. I left my vibrator on the the bathroom counter. FML

#19609877
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10708) - you deserved it (57491)

On 05/12/2012 at 12:24am - intimacy - by Hunter101 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while in the break room at work, I laughed at a co-worker's joke and started choking on my drink. My boss exclaimed in front of everyone, "We need to teach this girl how to swallow!" to everyone's childish amusement. Now they won't stop calling me Spit. FML

#19608060
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19020) - you deserved it (2571)

On 05/11/2012 at 5:23pm - work - by mel (woman) - United Kingdom (Bournemouth)

Today, I started my new job. It seems my colleagues are moronic pranksters, because when I leaned back in my chair, the back-rest fell apart and I fell to the ground, to much laughter. My boss immediately shouted at me to "stop fucking about." FML

#19598076
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19476) - you deserved it (1687)

On 05/09/2012 at 4:10pm - work - by dan (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I'm cheering myself up about being newly single by having a sleepover with my best friends. Their boyfriends have all decided to sleep over as well though, so I'm currently alone in a corridor with nothing but the sound of all my friends having loud sex to keep me company. FML

#19588990
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35069) - you deserved it (3801)

On 05/07/2012 at 8:25pm - intimacy - by coffeeshopgirl (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I asked my dad why there were no photos of me on the wall. He replied, "Every time you disappoint us we burn one." FML

#19586113
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28778) - you deserved it (4620)

On 05/07/2012 at 5:51am - misc - by N (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, while I was sneaking a boy out of my room at 2am, I ran into my mom sneaking a man into her room. FML

#19568801
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33544) - you deserved it (9728)

On 05/03/2012 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by dentistrygirl - United States



FML's blog

  • Élodie's Illustrated FML
  • Aaaaah, the beach, the sunshine, cool water against our skin...  Nah, just kidding, I can't afford a trip to the beach. This blog is being written from a grotty apartment in the less salubrious parts of…

Friday 18 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: