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lizzlegirl

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lizzlegirl
  • Town/Country : mentorr, usa
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 17 December 1996 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 1006
  • Number of comments : 28
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About lizzlegirl : life is a beach n im just playin in the sand.

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lizzlegirl's favorite FMLs

Today, these kids in my math class told me to ask this girl if I could lick her clit. I basically yelled 'what's a clit'? Everyone looked at me. I'm a senior in high school, no one has yet to explain it to me. I had to google it when i got home. FML

#254280
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31080) - you deserved it (65755)

On 03/09/2009 at 7:29pm - intimacy - by danmarino (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I was having sex with my wife when my 14 year old daughter from her room texts me, "Stop." FML

#197620
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25906) - you deserved it (66075)

On 03/03/2009 at 5:28pm - intimacy - by dad (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had the cops called on me because I accidentally texted "I'm going to kill you and use your head as hood ornament" to my ex-fiancé, instead of my best friend. I only texted that because he got a better grade on an exam than me. Now I have a court date. FML

#133313
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23643) - you deserved it (32523)

On 02/25/2009 at 2:05pm - misc - by Joe (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
481 comments

I agree, your life sucks (178070) - you deserved it (61482)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)

Today, I received a text message from my older brother. It said, "Ah... I want you". I hope to god it was intended for someone else. FML

#3715
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19494) - you deserved it (1098)

On 01/30/2009 at 10:50am - misc - by Ren - United States (Illinois)

Today, the ugliest girl in school walked by me and said "ewwww". FML

#1091
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17626) - you deserved it (4751)

On 01/14/2009 at 8:09am - love - by Mr. Shawzy - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, whilst reading all 15 pages of this site, my French girlfriend asked me over my shoulder for translations, such as "What is buttsex?", "What is wanking?", and "What means farted?" FML

#513
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15525) - you deserved it (4303)

On 12/14/2008 at 8:14am - intimacy - by james - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I'm heading towards my car clutching a bunch of flowers for my girlfriend, when along comes a sweet old lady who says: "it's not flowers she wants, it's some lovin'!". The elderly sure aren't what they used to be. FML

#449
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15617) - you deserved it (1976)

On 12/04/2008 at 6:16am - misc - by DarkPhoenix - Sent from mobile version

Today, I lost my cell phone. But found it again! And then dropped it in the toilet. FML

#21
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36535) - you deserved it (15613)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:30am - money - by enjoy -



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