lizlaz

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lizlaz

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 22 February 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4011
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About lizlaz : I'm Lizzie, I love Dr Who, The Mighty Boosh, Green Day and Manic Street Preachers...

lizlaz's page activity

Visits<b>zerolight</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 1:43am<b>hunterfish69</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 7:07pm<b>iRydePwnies</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 8:56pm<b>assurant</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 8:05pm<b>homesuckfucker</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 12:40am<b>breaking6883</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 6:59pm<b>adamant84</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 1:46am<b>benxben</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 1:53am<b>yareens</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 10:38am<b>Damafia</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 8:53pm<b>jazzybrar</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 3:33pm<b>Reva750</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 1:02pm<b>starcaller17</b> - the 03/11/2014 at 1:06am<b>Sinester69</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 10:09pm<b>MandyCat484</b> - the 12/16/2013 at 10:37pm<b>tiernang</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 8:27am<b>ty4nier</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 2:18am<b>Spetz14</b> - the 02/26/2013 at 2:06am

lizlaz's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

lizlaz's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked into the kitchen and accidentally broke my mother's vase. I said, "Accidents happen." She replied, "Yeah, like your birth." FML

by Cody / 03/07/2009 at 1:15pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, it was my final meeting with my psychologist who was helping me with my bipolar disorder. I just found out that he committed suicide. FML

by drakx88 / 03/06/2009 at 12:11pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, a creepy man on the subway said he liked my eyeballs. It was the best compliment I've received in months. FML

by Noname / 03/04/2009 at 7:29pm / United States (New York) / Transportation

Today, I came to work, to find my creepy boss sitting in my office. I work the night shift, so very unusual to find him there. I asked how he was, and he replied, "I told my wife about us; she kicked me out." I've been working there a month. Also, I'm married and pregnant. So, excuse me, "US?" FML

by oh_mylanta / 03/02/2009 at 4:10am / United States (Illinois) / Work

Today, my mother told me she was going out of town this weekend. I re-assured her that I would not throw a party. She replied "Oh, like you have enough friends to do that." FML

by stinker / 02/21/2009 at 8:20pm / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my grandmother called. She greeted me by my mother's name. When I told her it was not my mother, she apologized and corrected herself, but this time she addressed me as my sister. When I told her it was not my sister either, she said "Sorry, wrong number" and hung up. FML

by fuckthat / 02/18/2009 at 12:08am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I called my grandmother to wish her a happy Valentines Day. She asked me if I had a date lined up. I didn't, and before I could explain why, she responded with, "Well, maybe all the other gays went on vacation!" Thanks Grandma, I'm not gay. FML

by kolgate / 02/15/2009 at 5:12am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was talking to my parents about feeling insecure with my "beach body" as Spring Break keeps getting closer and closer. My dad warned me by saying, "Don't wear a gray swimsuit. People will try to roll you back into the ocean". FML

by Shamu / 02/13/2009 at 7:15pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I lit a cigarette in the opposite direction of the wind. My hair blew into it, and caught on fire. FML

by a genius / 02/12/2009 at 8:28am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was discussing my family heritage with my girlfriend's parents. The moment I told them that I came from a German background, her seven-year-old brother pointed at me and yelled, "HITLER!" FML

by razzmataz / 01/28/2009 at 8:38am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, me and my family watched the video of my birth. In the video, when my mother sees me for the first time, she says "God he's ugly!" FML

by mat / 01/21/2009 at 1:02am / Miscellaneous

Today, when I came home, my daughter's baby-sitter was busy smelling my thongs. FML

by noname / 01/02/2009 at 10:26pm / Kids

Today, at the Eurostar customs, an officer asked me if I had packed my luggage myself. I teasingly answered "No, I was helped by a member of Al Qaeda." which earned me a body and luggage search and a missed train. FML

by Behemoth2 / 12/14/2008 at 12:15am / Transportation