Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

lizlaz

Search for a member

lizlaz

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 22 February 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3505
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About lizlaz : I'm Lizzie, I love Dr Who, The Mighty Boosh, Green Day and Manic Street Preachers...

lizlaz's page activity

Visits<b>adamant84</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 1:46am<b>benxben</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 1:53am<b>yareens</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 10:38am<b>Damafia</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 8:53pm<b>jazzybrar</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 3:33pm<b>Reva750</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 1:02pm<b>starcaller17</b> - the 03/11/2014 at 1:06am<b>Sinester69</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 10:09pm<b>MandyCat484</b> - the 12/16/2013 at 10:37pm<b>tiernang</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 8:27am<b>ty4nier</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 2:18am<b>the_rude_dude</b> - the 07/10/2013 at 1:04pm<b>Spetz14</b> - the 02/26/2013 at 2:06am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:57pm<b>Ikura</b> - the 06/09/2010 at 3:59pm<b>Holybatman</b> - the 05/10/2010 at 10:01pm<b>Flea</b> - the 09/26/2009 at 3:06pm<b>iBou</b> - the 07/09/2009 at 5:40pm

lizlaz's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

lizlaz's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked into the kitchen and accidentally broke my mother's vase. I said, "Accidents happen." She replied, "Yeah, like your birth." FML

#234028
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (94894) - you deserved it (18611)

On 03/07/2009 at 1:15pm - misc - by Cody (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, it was my final meeting with my psychologist who was helping me with my bipolar disorder. I just found out that he committed suicide. FML

#225762
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (118943) - you deserved it (5627)

On 03/06/2009 at 12:11pm - health - by drakx88 (man) - United States (California)

Today, a creepy man on the subway said he liked my eyeballs. It was the best compliment I've received in months. FML

#210139
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58376) - you deserved it (3514)

On 03/04/2009 at 7:29pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I came to work, to find my creepy boss sitting in my office. I work the night shift, so very unusual to find him there. I asked how he was, and he replied, "I told my wife about us; she kicked me out." I've been working there a month. Also, I'm married and pregnant. So, excuse me, "US?" FML

#180985
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (91129) - you deserved it (4692)

On 03/02/2009 at 4:10am - work - by oh_mylanta (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mother told me she was going out of town this weekend. I re-assured her that I would not throw a party. She replied "Oh, like you have enough friends to do that." FML

#98981
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41658) - you deserved it (3732)

On 02/21/2009 at 8:20pm - misc - by stinker (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my grandmother called. She greeted me by my mother's name. When I told her it was not my mother, she apologized and corrected herself, but this time she addressed me as my sister. When I told her it was not my sister either, she said "Sorry, wrong number" and hung up. FML

#65383
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46233) - you deserved it (2732)

On 02/18/2009 at 12:08am - misc - by fuckthat (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I called my grandmother to wish her a happy Valentines Day. She asked me if I had a date lined up. I didn't, and before I could explain why, she responded with, "Well, maybe all the other gays went on vacation!" Thanks Grandma, I'm not gay. FML

#45880
16 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39641) - you deserved it (2663)

On 02/15/2009 at 5:12am - misc - by kolgate (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was talking to my parents about feeling insecure with my "beach body" as Spring Break keeps getting closer and closer. My dad warned me by saying, "Don't wear a gray swimsuit. People will try to roll you back into the ocean". FML

#38789
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48062) - you deserved it (7820)

On 02/13/2009 at 7:15pm - misc - by Shamu (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I lit a cigarette in the opposite direction of the wind. My hair blew into it, and caught on fire. FML

#30360
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12013) - you deserved it (53643)

On 02/12/2009 at 8:28am - misc - by a genius (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was discussing my family heritage with my girlfriend's parents. The moment I told them that I came from a German background, her seven-year-old brother pointed at me and yelled, "HITLER!" FML

#3008
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23689) - you deserved it (2591)

On 01/28/2009 at 8:38am - misc - by razzmataz - United States (California)

Today, me and my family watched the video of my birth. In the video, when my mother sees me for the first time, she says "God he's ugly!" FML

#1975
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27738) - you deserved it (2001)

On 01/21/2009 at 1:02am - misc - by mat - Sent from mobile version

Today, when I came home, my daughter's baby-sitter was busy smelling my thongs. FML

#687
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26028) - you deserved it (2017)

On 01/02/2009 at 10:26pm - misc - by noname - Sent from mobile version

Today, at the Eurostar customs, an officer asked me if I had packed my luggage myself. I teasingly answered "No, I was helped by a member of Al Qaeda." which earned me a body and luggage search and a missed train. FML

#510
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6439) - you deserved it (57775)

On 12/14/2008 at 12:15am - misc - by Behemoth2 - Sent from mobile version



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: