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livemaerd

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livemaerd

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 8 April 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 319
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About livemaerd : I'm a paradox, ironic, iconic, heroic, pathetic, idiotic, sarcastic, made of plastic, mnemonic, supersonic Artist that has nothing more to say except for: 'I love my girl more than my own life...'

livemaerd's page activity

Visits<b>Lillias</b> - the 03/10/2014 at 11:48am<b>nmorris95</b> - the 02/06/2013 at 12:18am

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This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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livemaerd's favorite FMLs

Today, I got into an argument with my girlfriend over how many sides a triangle has. I actually ended up drawing her a diagram. FML

#20029320
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23919) - you deserved it (3745)

On 08/19/2012 at 1:51am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found myself trying to explain to my puppy why I'm still single. I think I just found out why. FML

#20028660
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18190) - you deserved it (5680)

On 08/18/2012 at 7:02pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that my six year old cousin has a raging crush on my boyfriend. She lives across the street and watches from her window for his car to appear in front of my house. She's indicated that she'll stop at nothing until he's hers. FML

#20028447
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22949) - you deserved it (1912)

On 08/18/2012 at 4:34pm - kids - by yoggabe (woman) - Mexico (Tabasco)

Today, I found out that my new husband is expecting two children: ours, due in January, and our 16-year-old neighbor's, due in March. FML

Today, while at the grocery store, I saw my mother. I thought it would be funny to scare her by sneaking up and grabbing her ass. Not only was it not my mom, I left the place with a ban from ever returning to that store. FML

#20024799
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6958) - you deserved it (40501)

On 08/16/2012 at 5:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was so bored that I actually read the iTunes store's terms and conditions. FML

#20024681
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30684) - you deserved it (7393)

On 08/16/2012 at 3:50pm - misc - by cardsftw - United States (California)

Today, my mom asked me if I had any plans to go out tonight. To divert attention, I pretended to be angry and accused her of prying into my social life. Actually, I have no social life and nobody to go out with. My only "big plans" were to finish my Sudoku book. FML

#20023891
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9101) - you deserved it (19785)

On 08/16/2012 at 2:33am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I realized why my sister refuses to let me clean her side of the room. She's secretly been trying to revive dead ants. FML

#20023605
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21542) - you deserved it (1502)

On 08/16/2012 at 12:05am - misc - by scarredforlife - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was hanging out with my brother and his friends. While we were walking to the store, there was a loud snap. Everyone jumped. My bra had snapped, and I had to hold back tears of pain and pretend I was just as confused as they were, while they searched for the source of the sound. FML

#20023182
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24112) - you deserved it (2472)

On 08/15/2012 at 7:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, I worked overtime with three guys who never shut up about partying and getting laid. When I finally escaped the testosterone and got home, the first thing I heard was my grandpa telling my dad all about how he once fisted a girl to orgasm. FML

#20023096
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32011) - you deserved it (2680)

On 08/15/2012 at 6:52pm - intimacy - by what the FUCK (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I realized that my neighbors can not only hear me singing in the shower through my apartment's paper-thin walls, they also take great delight in recording it so that they can play it at high volume for their friends when they next throw a party. I want to disappear. FML

#20022923
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20739) - you deserved it (3686)

On 08/15/2012 at 5:14pm - misc - by ShowerStar (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was drawing while on the train, when a very good-looking woman looked at my work and said, "Wow, she's pretty. Is it supposed to be me?" She said it in a flirty tone, but before I could stop myself, I'd said "nah, it's just a generic face". FML

#20022605
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19336) - you deserved it (9340)

On 08/15/2012 at 1:41pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, thanks to a new form of birth control, I've now been having my period non-stop for six weeks. FML

#20022564
346 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35932) - you deserved it (3971)

On 08/15/2012 at 1:08pm - health - by theflow (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, it finally clicked in my mind how desperately lonely I am, when I shaved one of my legs just to find out what a woman's leg feels like. FML

#20022524
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23057) - you deserved it (7864)

On 08/15/2012 at 12:46pm - love - by lonely. (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I realized why it's not a good idea to sleep with your boyfriend when he still lives with his mom. She may walk in, make you get dressed, and demand what you have to say for yourself. Trust me, "Your son is good at sex" is not the right answer. FML

#20022504
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16369) - you deserved it (34046)

On 08/15/2012 at 12:31pm - intimacy - by shelby124 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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