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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, my cousin came to visit from America. While out shopping, she said loudly that she was having trouble finding clothes to fit around her huge fanny, causing a lot of people to stare in our direction. I had to explain to her that "fanny" in the UK means "vagina." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27627) - you deserved it (2871)
On 09/09/2010 at 10:00am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, my girlfriend's mom and dad walked in on us while we were playing naked twister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15794) - you deserved it (21891)
On 08/12/2010 at 12:19pm - intimacy - by FML (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)
Today, in math class, I had the urge to fart. I had the bright idea that if I dropped my textbook and farted at the same time, nobody would hear it. I dropped my textbook, everyone looked at me, then I farted. Loudly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14994) - you deserved it (44106)
On 06/22/2010 at 9:41pm - health - by fartwoman - United States (California)
Today, when I went to pick up my daughter from preschool, I found out she'd "accidentally" tried to flush her clothes down the toilet while going to the bathroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18091) - you deserved it (2210)
On 05/23/2010 at 2:02pm - kids - by rkl2010 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was buying condoms for my girlfriend and myself. While at the checkout counter, my guy friend sees me, runs to me, puts his arm around me, kisses me on the cheek, then yells "Thank you baby!" There were about twenty people behind me, they all gave me dirty looks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29420) - you deserved it (7540)
On 05/09/2010 at 10:20am - intimacy - by imustbegay - United States
Today, I started to type up a mass text to tell a decent amount of my friends that I'd just come home to a surprise from my boyfriend. Trying to fix a typo, I accidentally hit send with the text only saying "Guess what?! I just came." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18358) - you deserved it (7815)
On 03/14/2010 at 10:49am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I was at McDonald's. I bumped into a guy, and as I was helping him pick up his food, I realized he was cute. I began smiling and I was about to introduce myself, when he began laughing and said ,"It's you! I've heard about you!" He left laughing. I still don't know who he is, or what made him laugh. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21681) - you deserved it (2303)
On 02/18/2010 at 1:38am - misc - by Lizzielollipop816 (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I hurried into the bank to cash in the $5,000 check my grandparents had given me for college money. I found out that instead of my name, they wrote 'our sweet iddle pumpkinbutt'. I couldn't make eye contact with anyone after. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17945) - you deserved it (3177)
On 01/17/2010 at 4:08pm - misc - by pumpkinbutt - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was trying to see how far I could get away from the toilet while pissing. Instead I tripped over backwards and pissed all over my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5426) - you deserved it (50884)
On 01/02/2010 at 8:41am - misc - by pissfaced (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)
Today, I went to the movies. Not only did the movie end up being awful, but I came to my car to find out someone drew Squidward from "SpongeBob" with large letters spelling "I LIKE POTATOES!" on my windshield. In permanent marker. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21320) - you deserved it (2117)
On 11/14/2009 at 6:08am - misc - by squidwardpotatoes (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was talking and joking with my boyfriend. He said "Hey wanna hear a joke?" I said "Yes." He said, "Our relationship." and walked away. He seriously dumped me through a one-liner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40456) - you deserved it (3591)
On 09/27/2009 at 9:16pm - love - by screwwyou (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was having a really bad day and told my friend at lunch about how stressed I was and he gave me his brownie to cheer me up. After school, he texted me "Did the brownies kick in?" Yes, they did, right in the middle of my English presentation. They were "funny" brownies. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38300) - you deserved it (5392)
On 09/10/2009 at 5:34pm - misc - by englishclasshigh (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I went to a funeral for my coworker's father. While there, my dad's cell phone rang and he left to answer it. I turned to my brother and said, "I can't believe he brought his cell phone!" He whispered, "I can't believe he's got coverage. This is a dead zone!" I laughed loudly. At a funeral. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17853) - you deserved it (41590)
On 07/26/2009 at 1:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version
Today, I woke up finding myself violently humping my pillow. My mom recorded it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55731) - you deserved it (9515)
On 07/04/2009 at 4:58am - intimacy - by R_U_CEREAL (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I went to the store to buy groceries. I didn't care how I looked, so I wore an old shirt that said, "Thousands of my potential children died on your daughter's face last night." I ran into my girlfriend's parents at the store. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33738) - you deserved it (109110)
On 05/24/2009 at 3:50pm - misc - by helloitsbrian6969 (man) - United States (Florida)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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