Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

lind_saywhat

Search for a member

lind_saywhat

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 5 April 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 443
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About lind_saywhat : i'm lindsay, i'm 16, fml.

lind_saywhat's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:35pm

lind_saywhat's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

lind_saywhat's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the Wild Animal Park. There were bees everywhere. One brave bee, thinking he was Mr. Macho, flew right down my tank top in between my boobs. I freaked the hell out and ended up screaming and pulling down my shirt to get the bee out. I flashed about 10 kids and their families. FML

Today, I was babysitting some kids and helping them make a poster about insects. They couldn't think of any more insects to add so I suggested a spider, and got told to "not be a dumbass, spiders aren't insects they're arachnids." The girl is six. FML

#4079125
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17568) - you deserved it (50878)

On 07/27/2009 at 12:52pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I performed in my school play. Right before my big solo, I noticed a few girls changing backstage and I became aroused. The play was Jesus Christ Superstar, and I was playing Jesus. All I was wearing was a little cloth, so the whole audience saw Jesus get hard during the crucifixion. FML

#981592
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (95841) - you deserved it (39140)

On 04/14/2009 at 11:27pm - intimacy - by jizzlemonster13 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I performed in my school play. Right before my big solo, I noticed a few girls changing backstage and I became aroused. The play was Jesus Christ Superstar, and I was playing Jesus. All I was wearing was a little cloth, so the whole audience saw Jesus get hard during the crucifixion. FML

#981592
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (95841) - you deserved it (39140)

On 04/14/2009 at 11:27pm - intimacy - by jizzlemonster13 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. All of a sudden he jumped off of me, going "shit, shit!". Worried, i asked him what was wrong. He shouted "I forgot to set my TiVO!" FML

#709735
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (106376) - you deserved it (7849)

On 03/30/2009 at 8:06pm - intimacy - by Jenny (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, we got our yearbooks for school. I opened to my profile to see that they misspelled my first name which is James. They wrote Lames. FML

#598465
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (156559) - you deserved it (12601)

On 03/25/2009 at 12:32pm - misc - by rusty2020 (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my 11 year old brother walked in on me sitting on my boyfriend's ass and giving him a back massage. He tilted his head a little and then said "Aren't you guys doing it wrong? Isn't he supposed to be on top?" My boyfriend laughed and gave him a high-five. FML

#560138
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (101394) - you deserved it (31174)

On 03/23/2009 at 7:12pm - intimacy - by SLA (woman) - United States (Maryland)



FML's blog

  • Feeling shitty? Write to Auntie Bernie!
  • It's a new summer, so here's a new feature. OK, that doesn't mean much, but you've got to start somewhere. The idea came from the fact that we get sent a lot of FMLs that touch us, in our heart of…

Friday 24 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: