About limeyemilyy : Hey! I like reading fml's! (no duh ...) I comment every now and then.
Even though I am somewhat of a grammar Nazi, I won't troll anyone's mistakes. :)
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I got kicked in the crotch. It popped my cherry. I lost my virginity to a shoe. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47870) - you deserved it (4812)
On 09/19/2011 at 10:39am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23328) - you deserved it (6429)
On 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm - kids - by awesomekidsmum - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I had leg surgery. While I was recovering in the hospital, my boyfriend dumped me. I then had to ride home, a 2 hour drive, listening to my mother and aunt tell me he was the best thing to happen to me and I will never find a better man. Then the morphine wore off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33419) - you deserved it (1638)
On 09/17/2011 at 3:44am - love - by anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I had leg surgery. While I was recovering in the hospital, my boyfriend dumped me. I then had to ride home, a 2 hour drive, listening to my mother and aunt tell me he was the best thing to happen to me and I will never find a better man. Then the morphine wore off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33419) - you deserved it (1638)
On 09/17/2011 at 3:44am - love - by anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I walked into my dorm to find my roommate and his friends using my bass clarinet to smoke weed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25387) - you deserved it (3933)
On 09/14/2011 at 7:06am - misc - by funnymanjoe - United States (Illinois)
Today, while taking a stroll in the park, a kid walked up to me and asked, "Do you believe in unicorns?" I answered, "No." He dunked his ice cream cone on my head, laughed hysterically, and ran off screaming, "BELIEVE!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (23454) - you deserved it (10127)
On 09/13/2011 at 5:21pm - misc - by unicorn - United States (Georgia)
Today, I got home from work to find my wife asleep in her easy chair with my two year old son asleep in a pile of torn-up paper. I soon found out it was my 1960s collection of a Superman comic book series that I inherited from my dad. It was worth well over $2,000. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30756) - you deserved it (3320)
On 09/12/2011 at 10:15pm - kids - by Randy - United States (Alabama)
Today, I got bored and decided to visit a porn site. I typed in the address and hit enter. A split second later, I realized I wasn't typing into the browser address bar, but in a chat window on my other screen. I'd been chatting with a girl I wanted to get with at the time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10637) - you deserved it (52843)
On 09/11/2011 at 1:53pm - intimacy - by Extended_desktop (man) - Poland
Today, I was eating noodles. Midway through chewing, I sneezed. The noodles got stuck in my nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22241) - you deserved it (2704)
On 09/11/2011 at 11:15am - health - by bob - United States (New Mexico)
Today, the girl I've been dating, and starting to fall in love with, walked out of the bathroom claiming we were going to be parents. I jumped off of the couch in disbelief, yelling, "Really?" She replied, "Really. I just gave birth to a huge dump baby." FML
I agree, your life sucks (33929) - you deserved it (6436)
On 09/11/2011 at 11:13am - misc - by CaseyFpC85 - United States (Florida)
Today, my father in law drunkenly announced at dinner that he wished my husband had married my best friend. No one stuck up for me. Not even my husband. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30469) - you deserved it (2116)
On 09/11/2011 at 12:19am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)
Today, my mom baked cupcakes for my visiting grandparents. Later, I saw my grandpa chowing down on them. Even later, my mom demanded to know why there were a dozen cupcake wrappers on my bed. I've essentially been framed by my own grandpa, and am now grounded for a month. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25227) - you deserved it (1751)
On 09/09/2011 at 9:57pm - kids - by why?! (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, my wife showed me what was missing in our marriage with a Twilight video montage. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28276) - you deserved it (3192)
On 09/08/2011 at 8:52am - love - by I_dislike_Twilight (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I missed my bus, so I walked home in the rain from school, only to realize my mom had been following me the whole time in the car, laughing her ass off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30423) - you deserved it (2991)
On 09/07/2011 at 7:53pm - misc - by me - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my fiancé played Rockband drums from the bathroom while taking a crap. He actually managed to properly hit notes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15782) - you deserved it (2741)
On 09/07/2011 at 7:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
