limeyemilyy

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limeyemilyy

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5694
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About limeyemilyy : Hey! I like reading fml's! (no duh ...) I comment every now and then.
Even though I am somewhat of a grammar Nazi, I won't troll anyone's mistakes. :)

limeyemilyy's page activity

Visits<b>misspeach13</b> - the 07/28/2016 at 10:46pm<b>Crf250R37</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 12:53pm<b>senor_octubre</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 9:17am<b>ismedrage</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 10:30am<b>Holmes27</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 3:53pm<b>MitchellIIt</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 11:36pm<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 10:15pm<b>cocainewhore</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 3:48pm<b>bloodierframe30</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 10:50pm<b>bryguy89</b> - the 09/27/2013 at 1:36am<b>0llys</b> - the 07/06/2013 at 12:46am<b>anonimeeeee</b> - the 05/16/2013 at 1:11pm<b>shorty6823</b> - the 04/07/2013 at 1:46am<b>Release_929</b> - the 02/12/2013 at 1:34am<b>BurningGrannies</b> - the 11/18/2012 at 2:01pm<b>iSatori_11</b> - the 08/27/2011 at 1:48pm<b>lastsinglepanda</b> - the 08/27/2011 at 8:33am<b>urcadox</b> - the 08/27/2011 at 5:07am

Fucked!<b>senor_octubre</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 3:17pm

limeyemilyy's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

limeyemilyy's favorite FMLs

Today, I got kicked in the crotch. It popped my cherry. I lost my virginity to a shoe. FML

by Anonymous / 09/19/2011 at 10:39am / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML

by awesomekidsmum / 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I had leg surgery. While I was recovering in the hospital, my boyfriend dumped me. I then had to ride home, a 2 hour drive, listening to my mother and aunt tell me he was the best thing to happen to me and I will never find a better man. Then the morphine wore off. FML

by anonymous / 09/17/2011 at 3:44am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I had leg surgery. While I was recovering in the hospital, my boyfriend dumped me. I then had to ride home, a 2 hour drive, listening to my mother and aunt tell me he was the best thing to happen to me and I will never find a better man. Then the morphine wore off. FML

by anonymous / 09/17/2011 at 3:44am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I walked into my dorm to find my roommate and his friends using my bass clarinet to smoke weed. FML

by funnymanjoe / 09/14/2011 at 7:06am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, while taking a stroll in the park, a kid walked up to me and asked, "Do you believe in unicorns?" I answered, "No." He dunked his ice cream cone on my head, laughed hysterically, and ran off screaming, "BELIEVE!" FML

by unicorn / 09/13/2011 at 5:21pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got home from work to find my wife asleep in her easy chair with my two year old son asleep in a pile of torn-up paper. I soon found out it was my 1960s collection of a Superman comic book series that I inherited from my dad. It was worth well over $2,000. FML

by Randy / 09/12/2011 at 10:15pm / United States (Alabama) / Kids

Today, I got bored and decided to visit a porn site. I typed in the address and hit enter. A split second later, I realized I wasn't typing into the browser address bar, but in a chat window on my other screen. I'd been chatting with a girl I wanted to get with at the time. FML

by Extended_desktop / 09/11/2011 at 1:53pm / Poland / Intimacy

Today, I was eating noodles. Midway through chewing, I sneezed. The noodles got stuck in my nose. FML

by bob / 09/11/2011 at 11:15am / United States (New Mexico) / Health

Today, the girl I've been dating, and starting to fall in love with, walked out of the bathroom claiming we were going to be parents. I jumped off of the couch in disbelief, yelling, "Really?" She replied, "Really. I just gave birth to a huge dump baby." FML

by CaseyFpC85 / 09/11/2011 at 11:13am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, my father in law drunkenly announced at dinner that he wished my husband had married my best friend. No one stuck up for me. Not even my husband. FML

by Anonymous / 09/11/2011 at 12:19am / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, my mom baked cupcakes for my visiting grandparents. Later, I saw my grandpa chowing down on them. Even later, my mom demanded to know why there were a dozen cupcake wrappers on my bed. I've essentially been framed by my own grandpa, and am now grounded for a month. FML

by why?! / 09/09/2011 at 9:57pm / United States (Ohio) / Kids

Today, my wife showed me what was missing in our marriage with a Twilight video montage. FML

by I_dislike_Twilight / 09/08/2011 at 8:52am / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, I missed my bus, so I walked home in the rain from school, only to realize my mom had been following me the whole time in the car, laughing her ass off. FML

by me / 09/07/2011 at 7:53pm / United States (New Jersey) / Transportation

Today, my fiancé played Rockband drums from the bathroom while taking a crap. He actually managed to properly hit notes. FML

by Anonymous / 09/07/2011 at 7:02pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous