About limegreenpoopie : Hey there, I'm Maha. And I don't bite.
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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
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Today, I got pulled over. When the cop asked where I was coming from, reflexively I said, "Your mom's house." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8016) - you deserved it (41495)
On 02/13/2012 at 10:30am - misc - by SpLo0gIeR - United States
Today, I had to cancel my wedding. On top of being upset about the break up, I was informed I owed a $900 cancellation fee for not using the venue. Single and broke. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25768) - you deserved it (2652)
On 01/11/2012 at 11:31am - money - by metalflower01 - United States
Today, I found out while skiing that my dad likes to call me Pimple because I have a pink coat and white helmet. He has tried to squeeze me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17470) - you deserved it (4421)
On 12/20/2011 at 12:16pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend. I had been hiding the ring in the sock drawer. When I went to retrieve it, the ring was gone and in its place was a sticky note that said "NO." FML
I agree, your life sucks (45050) - you deserved it (2295)
On 12/14/2011 at 12:15am - love - by newlysingle (man) - United States
Today, I cleaned my toilet. I had forgotten it was white. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4899) - you deserved it (30047)
On 12/04/2011 at 7:40pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I played Taboo with my boyfriend and my conservative family. It was my boyfriend's turn and his word was "cherry". His only clue to me was, "I popped your..." He was the only one who found it funny. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29744) - you deserved it (3718)
On 12/04/2011 at 12:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, while spooning my spouse, I was awakened in the wee hours by a huge, junk-rattling fart. This has happened numerous times since she became a vegetarian. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22714) - you deserved it (2494)
On 11/02/2011 at 1:06am - misc - by steve-o - United States
Today, my boss made me run yet another stupid errand. When I delivered the paperwork to his office, I saw an email printout on his desk. Apparently, he has a plan in the works to get me "FRIED" next month. I'm not sure whether to give him a letter of resignation or a bottle of barbecue sauce. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17893) - you deserved it (1698)
On 10/27/2011 at 12:15pm - work - by last literate - Canada (Saskatchewan)
Today, my 28-year-old brother who has been pranking me all my life, put a chocolate cupcake on my chair. I sat on it, with my white dress. On my wedding day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55369) - you deserved it (2806)
On 10/17/2011 at 4:39am - misc - by cupcake_butt - United States
Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28666) - you deserved it (18159)
On 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I could actually feel my toe hairs flapping in the breeze. I'm a girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19012) - you deserved it (13632)
On 10/07/2011 at 6:35am - misc - by Hairytoes - United States
Today, after several long years, a lot of debt, and two great degrees from a top university, I had to move back in with my parents, because no matter where I look, I can't find a job. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27634) - you deserved it (2582)
Today, my parents' divorce was finalized, and my mother decided to publicly celebrate with a bikini wax. She calls it her "Declaration of Independence". FML
I agree, your life sucks (20213) - you deserved it (1793)
On 09/03/2011 at 1:06pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my child-hating friend who vowed never to have any no matter what, announced that she's pregnant. I've had three IVF cycles, spent $90k in fertility treatments, and still can't conceive. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39887) - you deserved it (3735)
On 09/02/2011 at 6:02pm - kids - by anonymous - United States (Florida)
Today, I had to say "Put away your burrito," "that ruler is not a light saber," and "stop making dog noises" all in the same sentence at work. I teach Advanced Placement Calculus to high school seniors. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24426) - you deserved it (3460)
On 08/20/2011 at 3:42am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Monday 20 May 2013
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