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lilkim

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lilkim
  • Town/Country : Copenhagen, Denmark
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 3 December 1994 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 1367
  • Number of comments : 100
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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lilkim's favorite FMLs

Today, I was sent to the hospital for being knocked out with a potato. FML

#7290118
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24884) - you deserved it (3442)

On 01/11/2010 at 10:40pm - health - by brileyyyy - United States (Missouri)

Today, I overheard my parents discussing whether or not they could trust me being alone in the house for 2 days. They then came to the decision that I'm too unpopular and unattractive to ever throw a wild party or get laid. FML

#7156329
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26820) - you deserved it (2060)

On 01/05/2010 at 12:00am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my best friend was texting me about her sick dog. She wrote "Do you think she will get better?", so I wrote "I hope she does". It wasn't until later that I realized I accidentally wrote "I hope she dies" instead. FML

#7154032
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28651) - you deserved it (8186)

On 01/04/2010 at 10:32pm - animals - by poordog (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I texted a somewhat overweight girl I wanted to hook up with and asked her "Have you been dating anyone lately?" Unfortunately with predictive text, "dating" came out as "eating". I didn't realize it till after it sent. FML

#6761205
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13867) - you deserved it (20942)

On 12/15/2009 at 3:32am - love - by Proof-Reader (man) - United States (California)

Today, I texted a somewhat overweight girl I wanted to hook up with and asked her "Have you been dating anyone lately?" Unfortunately with predictive text, "dating" came out as "eating". I didn't realize it till after it sent. FML

#6761205
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13867) - you deserved it (20942)

On 12/15/2009 at 3:32am - love - by Proof-Reader (man) - United States (California)

Today, a doctor examined my wrist, which is completely swollen and painful. He diagnosed a case of tendonitis and asked me, "Do you use this hand for a particular sort of sport?" I just smiled like a twit. FML

#6480683
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7285) - you deserved it (39653)

On 11/27/2009 at 4:24pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I saw a grasshopper in the urinal so I decided to pee on it. It jumped out, scared the hell out of me, and I peed all over myself. FML

#6302850
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6533) - you deserved it (65200)

On 11/14/2009 at 4:37pm - animals - by TheMichaelNixon - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was walking my dogs. I had a doggy bag, and was holding it closed, then breathing in it, so it would blow up. My dogs 'went', so I picked it up and kept walking. As I was heading home, I absent-mindedly started blowing into the bag again. Everything ended up in my mouth and on my face. FML

#5441991
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9570) - you deserved it (71037)

On 09/24/2009 at 1:17am - animals - by doggybag (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I wanted to make love with my boyfriend for the first time. I wanted everything to be perfect. The CD kept skipping, the rose petals had ants all over them, and he couldn't get it up. FML

#5011183
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43438) - you deserved it (9845)

On 09/02/2009 at 11:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I saw my girlfriend going into my best friend's dorm room and suspected her to cheat on me so I placed a camera in his room to spy on them. In the end, I discovered that my girlfriend has problems in math and both my best friend and brother are gay. FML

#4379475
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14966) - you deserved it (69915)

On 08/08/2009 at 3:18am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was going on a first date with a girl I really like. We were going to see the new Harry Potter movie, and she told me she was getting all dressed up. It was only after I picked her up I realized she meant that she was dressing nicely. I was dressed as Harry Potter. FML

#3866065
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25962) - you deserved it (58206)

On 07/18/2009 at 9:26pm - misc - by harrysolo (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had to give a presentation about Adolf Hitler. I wanted to point out he was a very good speaker, and could incite a crowd. Instead, what came out was 'Hitler's oral skills made everyone go wild with excitement" FML

#2508726
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31739) - you deserved it (49740)

On 06/01/2009 at 7:12pm - misc - by Cail (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went to the doctor. For the past year, my stomach would get upset every time I ate. Attempting to ease the pain, I would always eat a piece of bread. My doctor told me I have Celiac disease, which means I'm allergic to gluten. I'm allergic to bread. FML



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