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liljew

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liljew
  • Town/Country : south Jordan , USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 11 April 1990 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 25
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About liljew : My whole life is an FML

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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

liljew's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. Right as she orgasmed, she screamed out Megatron's name. When I later confronted her about this, she said that she always had a crush on him and wanted to be queen of the Decepticons. I've been dating this lunatic for a year and half now. FML

#20056354
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12476) - you deserved it (15243)

On 09/03/2012 at 9:02pm - intimacy - by Loserbot (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was playing with my vibrator. I was getting close when all of a sudden it short-circuited and made a sound like a laughing clown, scaring me half to death. FML

#20050167
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22872) - you deserved it (4389)

On 08/30/2012 at 10:45pm - intimacy - by Geckosrock99 (woman) - United States (California)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I found out that I'm not actually allergic to chocolate, when my mom freely admitted to me that she made it up when I was a child because she didn't want to share any cookies with me. FML

#20049241
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27054) - you deserved it (1361)

On 08/30/2012 at 8:58am - misc - by Sarah - United States (New York)

Today, I discovered why my girlfriend is so obsessed with cutting my nails. She collects my clippings in a jar under her bed. She claims it will keep us together longer. FML

#20049093
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22764) - you deserved it (1760)

On 08/30/2012 at 4:04am - misc - by freaked out - Canada (Alberta)



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