lilemmy55

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Offline (the 06/15/2016 at 6:34am)

lilemmy55

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 18 April 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4719
  • Number of comments : 48
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About lilemmy55 : Country girl ❤ mudding ❤ fishing ❤ hunting ❤ follow me on twitter @BamitsEmilly

lilemmy55's page activity

Visits<b>TheGamerXYZ</b> - the 09/26/2016 at 5:45pm<b>ruudseriesx</b> - the 09/11/2016 at 7:08pm<b>heroqucas</b> - the 05/07/2016 at 6:05am<b>chocolateberries</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 7:51pm<b>nch_12</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 3:14pm<b>Bravewolf</b> - the 03/02/2016 at 11:37am<b>Altairae</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 10:32am<b>hullarms</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 4:09pm<b>Torvaltz</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 8:02pm<b>sandormatyi</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 5:44pm<b>BlackHawkSavior</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 12:57pm<b>Burton_Forever</b> - the 12/23/2015 at 3:55am<b>Nahpets</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 4:37pm<b>thecitizen</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 9:57am<b>Trollx</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 1:39pm<b>ratman775</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 4:43am<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 10/17/2015 at 4:16pm<b>veryunluckygirl</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 5:52pm

Fucked!<b>BlackHawkSavior</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 6:57pm<b>Nahpets</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 10:37pm<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 10/17/2015 at 10:16pm<b>HollywoodHitter</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 6:16am<b>THNxBunny</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 7:13am

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lilemmy55's favorite FMLs

Today, my brother and father thought it would be a good idea to wake me up by turning on a chainsaw and wearing hockey masks. FML

by unlucky dudebag / 01/29/2011 at 2:29am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 14 year old son got suspended and I had to pay for the damage after he sprayed "FUCK THE POLICE" on the back wall of his school. I'm a policeman. FML

by duckthehack / 01/28/2011 at 9:25am / Poland (Wielkopolskie) / Kids

Today, my uncle had a flashback to Vietnam. I'm now missing a tooth and have a cracked rib. FML

by Randall / 01/25/2011 at 2:28am / United States (California) / Health

Today, a friend and I saw some deer outside my car. Since we were both leaving for college the next day we wanted to do something memorable so we decided to chase the deer. Turns out the deer wanted to chase us too. We ran for over five minutes screaming. FML

by Anonymous / 01/22/2011 at 4:03am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals

Today, I walked in on my roommate flat-ironing his pubic hair. FML

by curlyisnogood / 01/09/2011 at 7:19pm / Health

Today, I got my eyebrow pierced. When I got home to show my family, my little sister said, "That's so fake!" and tore it off my face. FML

by the_pheasant66 / 06/26/2010 at 6:31am / Ireland (Dublin) / Health

Today, I put on some goggles on in the pool, only to go underwater and see an old man "discreetly" jerking it. FML

by today / 03/17/2010 at 2:12am / Intimacy

Today, I found out that pinching the tip of the condom before you roll it down to the base is NOT a suggestion. FML

by Drewzter / 01/10/2010 at 10:33pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I went on a date with a man I met on Halloween. It appears that his mullet wasn't actually part of his costume. FML

by Anonymous / 11/03/2009 at 9:12am / United States (Montana) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend and I walked to her couch while kissing with our eyes closed. Stumbling, we reached the couch and dropped our bodies, her on top of me. What I didn't know was that her kitty, Elvis, was napping. Elvis was very angry. FML

by peace_lost / 06/29/2009 at 6:59pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was getting a pedicure and the woman sitting next to me asked the lady if she could take the skin she had scraped off my feet home to her birds because they love skin. She then describes for 20 minutes how her birds love to sit on her when her sunburn is peeling and eat her skin. FML

by Anonymous / 06/25/2009 at 4:34am / United States (Maryland) / Health

Today, while working as a makeup artist in the mall, I was approached by a man who wanted to try lipstick (not unusual we do a lot of drag). While I'm applying it he starts to make gross noises and after a quick glance I realize he has a massive erection. He then whispers mmmm don't stop now. FML

by Anonymous / 05/08/2009 at 10:53am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I was pulled over by a police officer for speeding. After writing the ticket, he asked me why I was wearing a surgical mask. I told him that swine flu was found in our area and I was scared. He thought that I was insulting him and wrote me another ticket. FML

by Anonymous / 04/27/2009 at 2:24am / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I was at a professional hockey game. I wasn't paying attention and a puck was shot into the stands and hit me in the face. My mouth was bleeding and I lost two teeth. As I was trying to cough up my teeth the old man next to me shoved me over and stole the puck. Everyone cheered. FML

by thisblows / 04/11/2009 at 4:42pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy