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lilemmy55

Offline (the 01/20/2015 at 3:16am) | Search for a member

lilemmy55

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 18 April 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2401
  • Number of comments : 48
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About lilemmy55 : Country girl ❤ mudding ❤ fishing ❤ hunting ❤ follow me on twitter @BamitsEmilly

lilemmy55's page activity

Visits<b>tardisseeker</b> - yesterday at 10:11am<b>nixienicotine</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 10:02pm<b>DUBSTEPER98</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 2:15pm<b>youdumbstick</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 10:46am<b>Xsweglord420x</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 6:22pm<b>Eman9000</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 10:52pm<b>THNxBunny</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 1:13am<b>DarkSmoke591</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 3:11pm<b>jonloran</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 5:59pm<b>missmorggan</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 9:17am<b>ZachHatesPeople</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 9:59pm<b>broncosfan1996</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 6:32pm<b>frogpotatoz088</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 6:53pm<b>UnknownTracker</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 1:37am<b>Wondermage</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 9:18pm<b>bertpolo</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 1:31pm<b>camelotgrace</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 12:27pm<b>PresAgent</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 2:26am

Fucked!<b>THNxBunny</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 7:13am

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lilemmy55's favorite FMLs

Today, I was getting intimate with my husband on our anniversary day. He climbed on top of me and firmly placed his penis on my nose. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he burst into laughter and said I looked just like Squidward. FML

#18083202
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40873) - you deserved it (5252)

On 10/26/2011 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my son got really high and shaved the dog with my electric shaver. Not only does the dog look really bad, I didn't know my son used drugs. I now have to buy the dog a sweater and get my son some help. FML

#18078195
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33455) - you deserved it (5183)

On 10/26/2011 at 1:43am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my parents got rid of our detachable shower head. Looks like I'm single again. FML

#18070582
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28779) - you deserved it (34150)

On 10/25/2011 at 6:15am - intimacy - by sad - Reserved

Today, I was giving a PowerPoint presentation in class. When I put my flash drive into the computer, my folder opened up and a nude picture of myself popped right up on a 110 inch projector screen for all 35 students to see. This is a 16 week course. FML

#18044835
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15312) - you deserved it (59056)

On 10/22/2011 at 9:25am - misc - by jaymash - United States (Michigan)

Today, I introduced my new boyfriend to my parents. Everyone knows he's into the emo scene, but this didn't stop my dad from slowly looking him up and down, then saying, completely deadpan, "You never told us you were a lesbian, honey." FML

#18041675
315 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20479) - you deserved it (33843)

On 10/21/2011 at 9:33pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why it would be highly offensive and inappropriate for him to go as Caylee Anthony for Halloween. I think he's still planning on doing it. FML

#18030465
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23322) - you deserved it (4464)

On 10/20/2011 at 10:32am - love - by Miroslav208 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got a speeding ticket while taking my drivers license test. FML

Today, the clerk at Walmart asked me if the stretch mark cream I was buying was for my wife. I wish I could've said yes. FML

#17860948
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23291) - you deserved it (3853)

On 09/29/2011 at 1:01am - health - by random0605 - United States (Utah)

Today, out of my bedroom window, I can see my next door neighbour's window. On his ledge, I can see binoculars, tissues and vaseline. FML

#17818557
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43204) - you deserved it (4386)

On 09/24/2011 at 3:22am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I realized my tampon goes deeper than my boyfriend. FML

#17786255
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53388) - you deserved it (6371)

On 09/20/2011 at 3:45am - intimacy - by Cantgetno (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend called me over to her house. When I knocked, no one responded to the door. I decided to check the back yard and found her sunbathing by the pool. I kneeled by her and placed my hand on her butt, kissing her neck. What I heard next, "So this is what you do with my daughter." FML

#17753266
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36512) - you deserved it (23457)

On 09/15/2011 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I caught my pregnant wife trying to suck milk from her breasts. FML

#17749622
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33474) - you deserved it (5926)

On 09/15/2011 at 3:34am - health - by Scott - United States (California)

Today, I walked into my dorm to find my roommate and his friends using my bass clarinet to smoke weed. FML

#17742835
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31987) - you deserved it (5214)

On 09/14/2011 at 7:06am - misc - by funnymanjoe - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was masturbating while chewing gum. Halfway into the session, the gum flew down my throat, causing me to violently choke. My mom had to rush in and help me while I still had my pants around my ankles. FML

#17706134
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16509) - you deserved it (51665)

On 09/09/2011 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by omfgnooo (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I asked my Dad if it was true that my mother had a C-section at my birth. He replied "Yeah, so technically you weren't even born, you were surgically removed, like a tumor." FML

#17638273
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36147) - you deserved it (4524)

On 09/01/2011 at 7:40pm - misc - by mannydanny (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)



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