lilemmy55

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Offline (the 06/15/2016 at 6:34am)

lilemmy55

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 18 April 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4171
  • Number of comments : 48
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About lilemmy55 : Country girl ❤ mudding ❤ fishing ❤ hunting ❤ follow me on twitter @BamitsEmilly

lilemmy55's page activity

Visits<b>heroqucas</b> - the 05/07/2016 at 6:05am<b>chocolateberries</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 7:51pm<b>nch_12</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 3:14pm<b>Bravewolf</b> - the 03/02/2016 at 11:37am<b>Altairae</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 10:32am<b>hullarms</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 4:09pm<b>Torvaltz</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 8:02pm<b>sandormatyi</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 5:44pm<b>BlackHawkSavior</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 12:57pm<b>Burton_Forever</b> - the 12/23/2015 at 3:55am<b>Nahpets</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 4:37pm<b>thecitizen</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 9:57am<b>Trollx</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 1:39pm<b>ratman775</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 4:43am<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 10/17/2015 at 4:16pm<b>veryunluckygirl</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 5:52pm<b>tiger820</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 11:56am<b>amc597</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 12:05pm

Fucked!<b>BlackHawkSavior</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 6:57pm<b>Nahpets</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 10:37pm<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 10/17/2015 at 10:16pm<b>HollywoodHitter</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 6:16am<b>THNxBunny</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 7:13am

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lilemmy55's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that my new husband is expecting two children: ours, due in January, and our 16-year-old neighbor's, due in March. FML

by Just_Me_88 / 08/18/2012 at 1:09am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my mom threw my tampons in the garbage and said that from now on, I'll be buying pads instead. Turns out she read a scare story going around by email that all the local teens are soaking their tampons in alcohol and inserting them anally to secretly get drunk. FML

by jannister / 08/13/2012 at 3:25pm / Germany (Thuringen) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was fooling around on Omegle, when I came across a guy who claimed he could suck himself off. I was doubtful, but morbidly curious, so I told him to prove it. Turns out he could. Before I could close the browser window in horror, my dad walked in and got a good look too. FML

by didntevenknow / 08/13/2012 at 11:06am / Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur) / Intimacy

Today, I was fooling around on Omegle, when I came across a guy who claimed he could suck himself off. I was doubtful, but morbidly curious, so I told him to prove it. Turns out he could. Before I could close the browser window in horror, my dad walked in and got a good look too. FML

by didntevenknow / 08/13/2012 at 11:06am / Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur) / Intimacy

Today, I walked in on my fifteen-year-old son and his friends attempting to set up a rudimentary meth lab in his bedroom. I'm not sure whether to be angrier that they simply tried this, or that they thought burning up baking soda would somehow produce methamphetamine. FML

by JAdams / 08/12/2012 at 8:49pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Kids

Today, I was using a penis pump for the first time. It was awesome until it sucked my left testicle into the tube. I'll be singing soprano for a while now. FML

by tuggernuts / 07/17/2012 at 11:32am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I shaved my legs for the first time in three weeks. It took half an hour, three disposable razors, and I cut my legs up so badly they look worse then they did when they were hairy. FML

by Taylor / 07/15/2012 at 10:42am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm still freshly circumcised. My penis is still very sensitive, and I can't squat to grab stuff off the floor because of the pressure against my jeans. Kicking the objects up into my hands was working well, that is until I spilled a pack of 300 toothpicks all over the floor. FML

by Anonymous / 07/13/2012 at 7:14pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, I watched as my dad noticed a spider on the ceiling. Instead of getting a shoe, he pulled out a 9mm and shot it. I'm not sure if this is an epic win or a sign that my family is crazy. FML

by kalikanna / 07/07/2012 at 2:10am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to see a movie with my girlfriend and a few others. Mid-way through, I noticed my girlfriend giving a hand-job to my best friend. I couldn't believe my eyes, and I confronted them. He claimed he had been asleep, she claimed she was mopping up a spill, and I'm now single again. FML

by aranya / 06/14/2012 at 6:51pm / Netherlands (Overijssel) / Intimacy

Today, neither of my parents fought for my custody. FML

by Anon / 06/10/2012 at 12:19am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my roommate trying to smoke a Mars bar. FML

by holyshart / 06/05/2012 at 5:03am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my new girlfriend breastfeeds her dolls. FML

by whattheheck / 06/04/2012 at 12:34am / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the hospital for stomach pains, and was told that it sounds like I have an ovarian cyst. My mom went into a rage, screaming that I'd lied to her about being a virgin. Despite the doctor explaining that sexual activity has nothing to do with it, she refuses to believe him. FML

by Briscuit / 06/01/2012 at 5:05pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was playing an online game in nothing but my boxers, when suddenly a girl joined my team. I immediately felt embarrassed and put some pants on. There were no webcams involved. I need to get out more. FML

by furred / 06/01/2012 at 12:48am / Philippines / Geek