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lifesfailure

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lifesfailure

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  • Number of visits : 2983
  • Number of comments : 36
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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lifesfailure's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:22pm<b>BadBoyz90210</b> - the 06/21/2011 at 9:25am<b>FYLDeep</b> - the 11/24/2010 at 5:16am

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lifesfailure's favorite FMLs

Today, I was talking to my aunt about my brother's recent arrest for drug possession. I proudly told her that I have never done drugs of any kind. Her response: "Well, actually you were born addicted to heroin, so you had a drug problem long before your brother." FML

#6811262
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31615) - you deserved it (3139)

On 12/18/2009 at 2:23pm - health - by drugbaby (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I got a Christmas present from my boss. It was an ab workout video. FML

#6809461
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20124) - you deserved it (4053)

On 12/18/2009 at 11:19am - work - by B (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was watching TV. During a very long commercial break, I found my brothers PSP charger next to me. Out of boredom I put my tongue on the end on the metal. Not only did it fry my tongue but found its way to my metal filling in my tooth. I now have a sore tongue and a throbbing toothache. FML

#6803548
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4662) - you deserved it (71057)

On 12/17/2009 at 11:25pm - misc - by Shocked (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, a spider crawled across my glasses' lens. My first reaction was to smack myself in the face. FML

#6793560
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12462) - you deserved it (23817)

On 12/17/2009 at 2:09pm - animals - by ohmy (woman) - Canada

Today, I found that my Facebook account had been hacked, and all my friends were deleted. As I tried to add them all back, Facebook reported me as a hacker for adding too many people too quickly. FML

#6792843
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28532) - you deserved it (3207)

On 12/17/2009 at 12:49pm - misc - by gotthewrongman (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was playing with my yo-yo. I began showing off to my friends. When the girl I liked walked by, I thought it'd be really cool to do the move "dog bite". I ended hitting myself in the balls. Hard. FML

#6792186
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6932) - you deserved it (31952)

On 12/17/2009 at 11:34am - misc - by owmyballs - Thailand (Krung Thep)

Today, I found out that when an officer screams, "DON'T MOVE OR I'LL TASE YOU", it really means, "If you so much as flinch I'm going to shoot and 50,000 volts will be directed through your nose and groin." FML

#6785905
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24314) - you deserved it (10677)

On 12/16/2009 at 11:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, after many, many attempts to get her out of my life, the girl that is stalking me told me that she loves me and our love can only be ended by her killing either herself or me. FML

#6781373
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40575) - you deserved it (2157)

On 12/16/2009 at 6:55pm - love - by cheezmaster (man) - United States (California)

Today, both of my grandparents died in a car accident. My Mom and Dad thought it would make me feel better to know they were not my real grandparents, because I'm adopted. FML

#6774079
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55866) - you deserved it (2365)

On 12/16/2009 at 2:28am - misc - by barri (man) - Costa Rica (San Jose)

Today, after months of constant encouragement from my friends, I went and entered a singing contest. I sang and was booed off stage. Later on I found out my friends lied to me about my ability to sing, just so I could give them a cheap laugh. FML

#6759322
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25899) - you deserved it (5832)

On 12/15/2009 at 12:23am - misc - by Dean (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I had to call 911. Why? My fireplace caught on fire. FML

#6753816
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21832) - you deserved it (5855)

On 12/14/2009 at 7:00pm - misc - by fire - United States

Today, my little brother punched me in the stomach. When I didn't flinch and he asked me why, I decided to be funny and tell him I was Iron Man and nothing could hurt me. Two seconds later he took a step back and kicked me in the nuts as hard as he could. FML

#6753896
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10486) - you deserved it (33172)

On 12/14/2009 at 6:46pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was on AIM talking to a really cute guy, whom I've had a crush on for forever, when he asked me to video chat. I got so excited and immediately pressed accept, without thinking. Not until he started screaming and cursing did I realize that I was still using my laptop on the toilet. FML

#6753544
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8849) - you deserved it (57270)

On 12/14/2009 at 6:26pm - love - by toiletgirl (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was at my 10 year high school reunion. I saw the girl I used to have a BIG crush on, so I decided to go over and say hi. She screams when she sees me. Then, she starts hitting me, looking panicked. I control her and ask why she's hitting me. She says 'Everyone thought you were dead!' FML

#6753136
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36683) - you deserved it (2270)

On 12/14/2009 at 4:21pm - misc - by Ghost (man) - United States

Today, my crush took me to a park and told me he loved me. We sat on an old bench and were just about to kiss when I screamed. I now have a huge splinter in my arse and he can't stop laughing. FML

#6751631
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24695) - you deserved it (4556)

On 12/14/2009 at 12:06pm - love - by Mojo (woman) - United Kingdom



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