lex1459

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lex1459

441Fucked!

lex1459lex1459
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 April 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 8270
  • Number of comments : 309
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 28 posted

About lex1459 : Gene Parmesan is the true master of disguise.

lex1459's page activity

Visits<b>Chibster</b> - 24 hours ago<b>terryaly</b> - the 09/26/2016 at 7:44pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 09/25/2016 at 10:09am<b>Jonfun</b> - the 09/19/2016 at 12:50am<b>Diamond_don</b> - the 09/12/2016 at 9:14am<b>AlphaPrince13</b> - the 09/09/2016 at 6:56pm<b>JBChristian</b> - the 09/04/2016 at 8:23pm<b>Wolfo06</b> - the 08/31/2016 at 12:11am<b>TexanZaros</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 3:52pm<b>Sia_Will</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 2:55am<b>ruudseriesx</b> - the 08/18/2016 at 9:39am<b>TheGamingNirvana</b> - the 08/15/2016 at 8:11am<b>james08</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 9:29pm<b>deathtojesus</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 7:58am<b>jerry08157</b> - the 08/04/2016 at 4:56pm<b>Pizzacheese4</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 9:36pm<b>chrisbeaudoin</b> - the 07/31/2016 at 8:32pm<b>AmyLN</b> - the 07/30/2016 at 6:16pm

Fucked!<b>Diamond_don</b> - the 08/08/2016 at 4:57am<b>tay_arredondo</b> - the 07/23/2016 at 9:47pm<b>frecklesrose93</b> - the 07/23/2016 at 8:16am<b>jelrid</b> - the 07/23/2016 at 1:41am<b>nicolai44</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 9:38pm<b>bigmusclebro</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 9:21pm<b>TexasDiesel97</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 8:13pm<b>classicate</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 1:50pm<b>X_Gon_Giv_ItToYa</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 1:06pm<b>19teej96</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 12:45pm<b>bigdick6969</b> - the 07/11/2016 at 1:58am<b>CandyDawg</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 5:10am<b>sexton78</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 1:38am<b>Rintarok5</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 12:40am<b>Scootythedog</b> - the 07/03/2016 at 8:13pm<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 07/03/2016 at 4:03am<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 4:36am<b>ssnow</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 12:13pm

lex1459's FML badges

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Colonel_Whiskers

You liked our secret mascot. Well done, Sherlock!

See all of lex1459's badges

lex1459's favorite FMLs

Today, I waited on an elderly man whose wife had just left him. After him going on and on about how his dog will love his leftover chicken, I nervously caught a case of verbal diarrhea and uttered, "Well, if there's chicken involved, I'll get on my knees and be your dog." FML

by Anonymous / 01/23/2012 at 12:12am / United States / Work

Today, my long lost father came to visit me. He got drunk, then tried to beat me up. My neighbor called the police, and as soon as they got there, my father yelled, "Help! This man tried to stab me!" The sad part is, they believed him. FML

by Sadfaic / 01/22/2012 at 9:59pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, a man crashed into my car. He then got out of his car, dug a toothbrush and toothpaste out of his bag, and tried to brush away the damage. FML

by toothpaste / 01/19/2012 at 7:17am / Australia (New South Wales) / Transportation

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky. He pulled off my panties and was about to go down on me when he said, "Wait, what's this white thing?" It was a piece of toilet paper. FML

by Anonymous / 12/07/2011 at 12:47pm / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy

Today, I sat on Santa's lap. He got an erection. FML

by pops up / 12/01/2011 at 5:25pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, I photocopied several hundred pages of my school's textbook because I didn't want to buy it. My school later says to just buy it and it will be reimbursed. FML

by ChrisD2V / 11/30/2011 at 10:52pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, it's my soon to be 12 year old daughter's birthday. On my break at work I texted her how much I loved her and happy birthday. She replied with, "K, when will you be home? Mom won't let me open presents until you're here." Good to know I'm loved. FML

by Anonymous / 11/30/2011 at 2:55pm / United States / Kids

Today, my brother decided deodorant causes cancer. He goes to the gym every day. FML

by smellyhouse / 11/27/2011 at 5:19am / Canada (British Columbia) / Health

Today, I was arrested for breaking into a house. This is what happens when I lose my key. FML

by Matthew / 11/26/2011 at 9:33pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, after I went to collect my pay for babysitting, the girl's dad pulled the old "Can I pay you in Trident Layers?" bull on me. Hoping to show that I wasn't going to play ball, I told him that watching his gran inhale a cock would be funnier. If scowls could kill... FML

by Anonymous / 11/25/2011 at 9:09pm / United States (Nevada) / Money

Today, I found a condom on my bed with a note written by my girlfriend that said, "Since you started acting like a dick, you might as well dress like one." FML

by Dickhead / 11/25/2011 at 10:02am / Lebanon / Intimacy

Today, I was naked, still deciding what to wear, when the doorbell rang. I grabbed the closest thing to cover up with: my Snuggie. I answered the door, it was kids asking for donations. Without thinking, I turned around to grab my purse. FML

by anonymous / 11/15/2011 at 10:17pm / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom called me crazy and told me she wanted to put me in a mental hospital. She did this after repeatedly hitting me with a shoe. Why? Because I forgot to put the cap back on the toothpaste. FML

by whoopsboutthecap / 11/15/2011 at 7:51am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my brother in law got into a fight with my husband. My pregnant sister was yelling at her husband to stop beating my husband up. When I came into the room, I asked why they were fighting. You'll never guess who the real father of my sister's baby is. FML

by Good sister / 10/13/2011 at 7:20pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, I was brutally run over by a man in a wheelchair. FML

by Anonymous / 09/16/2011 at 1:26pm / United States / Miscellaneous