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lessthan0

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lessthan0

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 871
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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lessthan0's favorite FMLs

Today, after suffering with bad constipation and having to eat special bread to get me to go, I have practically just pooped out a week's worth of food in 15 minutes, and I'm still going. I've passed the ring of fire stage, now I just can't feel my asshole. FML

#19174199
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35036) - you deserved it (5314)

On 02/27/2012 at 10:55am - health - by awhmaaan - United Kingdom

Today, while over at a friend's house, I saw a framed picture of a young African boy on her fridge. I asked, "Oh, is this one of those kids you adopt from third world countries? My grandma does that too." She responded, "What do you mean? That's my cousin." FML

#18857503
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8999) - you deserved it (34670)

On 01/19/2012 at 10:33pm - kids - by WillaminaL (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went jogging with my girlfriend. I'm pretty sure my moobs bounced more than her breasts. FML

#18697207
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15128) - you deserved it (26333)

On 01/03/2012 at 2:36pm - misc - by max (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mom was feeling down because of her gray hairs. In an attempt to cheer her up, I suggested that she dye them. Her hair turned orange. FML

#18569978
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22013) - you deserved it (4920)

On 12/21/2011 at 12:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was naked, still deciding what to wear, when the doorbell rang. I grabbed the closest thing to cover up with: my Snuggie. I answered the door, it was kids asking for donations. Without thinking, I turned around to grab my purse. FML

#18259551
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13827) - you deserved it (29345)

On 11/15/2011 at 10:17pm - misc - by anonymous - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, while spooning my spouse, I was awakened in the wee hours by a huge, junk-rattling fart. This has happened numerous times since she became a vegetarian. FML

#18135742
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28205) - you deserved it (3323)

On 11/02/2011 at 1:06am - misc - by steve-o - United States

Today, I was using a public urinal when a man came up to use the one next to me. As he approached, he said, "Friendly spy plane inbound" and pretended to look at my knob. FML

#17448380
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25925) - you deserved it (2537)

On 08/12/2011 at 6:40am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, in an amphitheater, someone hit the back of my head. As I turned around, the guy apologized and said he mistook me for his friend. I changed seats, and after a while, I got hit a second time. He was wrong again. FML

#17159323
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29052) - you deserved it (3376)

On 07/18/2011 at 3:09am - misc - by fthislyfe (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, my six year old son came up to me with his arms spread and said, "I feel like a hug." I got really excited and hopeful because he is very anti-social and hates physical contact. As soon as I stood up to hug him he said "Feeling's gone" and walked away. FML

#17134448
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39347) - you deserved it (4249)

On 07/16/2011 at 9:28am - kids - by Rejected (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got home from work to find my house covered in graffiti dicks, the windows smashed, the front lawn entirely ripped up, and my letter box containing dog shit. I also found a note taped to the door saying, "Suck on this Darren". Darren is my next door neighbor. FML

#17063070
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57947) - you deserved it (2937)

On 07/11/2011 at 3:42am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I sprained my knee while going down on one knee to propose to my girlfriend. She laughed as I rolled in pain. I still haven't gotten an answer. FML

#16858982
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39649) - you deserved it (4283)

On 06/26/2011 at 12:29am - love - by smoothmove - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my professor handed me back a paper I spent hours upon hours working on. At the bottom in red it said "D" followed by, "that was a gift." FML

#16666880
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24756) - you deserved it (7308)

On 06/14/2011 at 8:59pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML

#16339516
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51827) - you deserved it (17587)

On 05/25/2011 at 4:23am - intimacy - by katie -

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate and planning on having sex for the first time. I picked her up off the couch, and in so doing, accidentally lifted her too high, putting her head through the ceiling. She had a mild concussion. FML

#15921187
378 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36341) - you deserved it (18825)

On 04/25/2011 at 3:31pm - intimacy - by Ouch (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mom confused me with my dad. She got in the shower with me. FML

#15883377
311 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80643) - you deserved it (6032)

On 04/22/2011 at 7:11am - intimacy - by Damian -



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