Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About legitkitty : I hate people who call the ones that look at their profile "creepers" or "stalkers". Seriously. It's extremely annoying. Okay, about me. Ummm... I love anime. I'm obsessed with hetalia. Italy is so cute! Also, I absolutely LOVE Attack On Titan. Eren x Rivaille is so fucking hot. If you hadn't already figured it out, I love cats. I have 2 cats, Mango & Jelly(I was 12 okay!). I'm fairly active, but I do enjoy reading about others' misfortunes and commenting on them, whether I get thumbed up or down or whatever. Uhh, that's about it, I'm kinda-really boring. Thanks for reading my profile anyways :)
You're still here??!? Uh, here's a snake! __________
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
Today, I went to the bookstore and saw a stunning girl reading. I walked over and picked up a book, thinking our two books were the same category, hence a good conversation starter. She looked at me, and I pointed at my book and smiled. After that, she left. It was a sex position book. FML
Today, I was at the beach with my parents, and I went for a swim in the sea. I got out and my parents started laughing their asses off. It wasn't until my dad pulled a condom out of my hair that I realized what they were laughing at. My dad even took a picture. FML
Today, I found out that the phone number I switched to, used to host an amateur phone sex hotline. I found this out after getting several calls by teenagers, who sounded as if they were masturbating even as I yelled that they had the wrong number. FML
Today, in a rush to get my clothes back on at my girlfriend's house at the sound of her parents opening the front door, I forgot to take the condom off. Her dad watched it fall out of my pant leg and onto the kitchen floor. FML
Today, I got into an argument with my mother, when she snapped and called me a son of a bitch. I said that made no sense, because I'm a girl, and it'd only really confirm that she's a bitch. She then grounded me for insulting her. FML
Today, I looked into my sink's garbage disposal for the first time since I moved in two months ago. Apparently, the putrid smell was not the food I've been throwing down it, but instead, a now what appears to be mutilated litter of rats. FML
Monday 1 September 2014