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lauryn_lovely

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lauryn_lovely
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1013
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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lauryn_lovely's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband won't talk to me because he got mad when I asked him what he thought about 'that lame performance last night'. He doesn't believe that I really was talking about football. FML

#13033071
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25012) - you deserved it (7452)

On 09/13/2010 at 9:24am - intimacy - by GonnaBeLonley2night - United States (Texas)

Today, I had a nice, open chat with my mother. I accidentally let slip that I'm a nymphomaniac. She accidentally let slip that my dad is bad in bed. I don't think either of us will be chatting so openly for awhile. FML

#13012343
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20906) - you deserved it (8170)

On 09/12/2010 at 12:07am - intimacy - by ewmomew (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to a zoo that had a gorilla in a cage. I walked up, and the gorilla stopped what he was doing, looked me in the eyes, and started jacking off. FML

#13005397
293 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33564) - you deserved it (9136)

On 09/11/2010 at 3:25pm - intimacy - by gorillalove - United States (Texas)

Today, I walked in on my mom taking nude pictures of herself in the kitchen, with only a Santa hat on. FML

#12989872
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35524) - you deserved it (3190)

On 09/10/2010 at 12:36pm - intimacy - by meikd423 - Sent from mobile version

Today, my family and I argued whether getting a period or boner in the middle of class was worse. At the dinner table. FML

#12986098
378 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25288) - you deserved it (11784)

On 09/10/2010 at 1:30am - intimacy - by Me - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out that I drunkenly texted my boss yesterday asking for nude pictures. He sent them. I'm afraid to go to work tomorrow. FML

#12967216
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12856) - you deserved it (32807)

On 09/08/2010 at 8:11pm - intimacy - by WTF?!?! - United States (Florida)

Today, I discovered that my husband is a tad paranoid after finding out that our cat has worms. He and I were in the middle of sharing a romantic shower following something of a dry spell when he bent over, spread his cheeks apart and asked, in earnest, "is there a worm sticking out of my ass?" FML

#12926382
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29122) - you deserved it (2888)

On 09/06/2010 at 12:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out what "supersoaked" means. I thought it meant getting shot by a water gun, which is why I laughed when my daughter's boyfriend said he "supersoaked" her. FML

#12894594
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29043) - you deserved it (6027)

On 09/04/2010 at 12:15am - intimacy - by FMyLife5915 -

Today, my mom told me I was conceived on Halloween. She thought it would be funny to say "Let's just say your dad was not wearing his ghost costume." She then winked. I am now scarred for life. FML

#12874867
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21700) - you deserved it (3524)

On 09/02/2010 at 8:29pm - intimacy - by anonymous.. (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I learned that my apartment's walls are thin enough for my neighbors to hear my vibrator. I've lived in this apartment for three years. I've been single and horny for all of them. FML

#12872328
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24852) - you deserved it (12495)

On 09/02/2010 at 5:09pm - intimacy - by Buzzie (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I found out that whenever my best friend used to say she wanted to do my dad, she wasn't kidding. She accomplished her mission in my bed after school. FML

#12851592
331 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45712) - you deserved it (3147)

On 09/01/2010 at 7:10am - intimacy - by fmlskank93 - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I walked in on my mom's boyfriend jacking off. The worst part was that he didn't stop. FML

#12849732
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33746) - you deserved it (3617)

On 09/01/2010 at 2:16am - intimacy - by Jill Shanks - United States

Today, after my husband's phone buzzed like crazy all morning, I decided to pick it up and see what all the fuss was about. He had three new picture messages from his "boss", naked and strapped to a chair with the caption, "Are you still coming over tonight?" We've been married for nine years and have two children. FML

#12838933
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54699) - you deserved it (3814)

On 08/31/2010 at 2:07pm - intimacy - by ashlee (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I talked to my boyfriend's dad for the first time. One of the first things that he said to me was, "So, I hear you're a screamer." FML

#12832697
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33462) - you deserved it (6226)

On 08/31/2010 at 1:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, it was really hot in my house so I pulled my shorts down so I was just in my boxers. My family and I were watching tv and I got a spontaneous erection. When I discreetly tried to pull my shorts back up, my penis flipped out of my boxers. FML

#12792346
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33024) - you deserved it (22083)

On 08/28/2010 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Sicko - Sent from mobile version



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