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lauryn_lovely

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lauryn_lovely

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  • Number of visits : 1171
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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lauryn_lovely's page activity

Visits<b>Wizardo</b> - the 10/01/2013 at 4:38am<b>MRVOlivia</b> - the 09/27/2013 at 11:14pm

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lauryn_lovely's favorite FMLs

Today, I was given an entire week of detention for planking on my school desk. FML

#18008479
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13361) - you deserved it (67838)

On 10/17/2011 at 6:05pm - misc - by planking champion (woman) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, my brother in law got into a fight with my husband. My pregnant sister was yelling at her husband to stop beating my husband up. When I came into the room, I asked why they were fighting. You'll never guess who the real father of my sister's baby is. FML

#17977094
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60539) - you deserved it (2968)

On 10/13/2011 at 7:20pm - love - by Good sister (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, after reading about seduction techniques, I wore shades and a brightly colored shirt to a club to attract female attention. However, the sunglasses rendered me almost blind, and I tripped over a step, crashed into tables, and thanks to the shirt, everyone saw it happen in glorious technicolor. FML

#17891002
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7917) - you deserved it (38040)

On 10/02/2011 at 9:34pm - misc - by hardtoignore - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I learned no matter how much your friends pressure you, you must never snort lines of curry powder. FML

Today, the shy girl in my class decided to bring a cake to share with everyone, since it was her birthday. Excited about the cake, I got everybody to sing "happy birthday" for her, only to realize too late that nobody in the class know her name, myself included. FML

#17801637
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10921) - you deserved it (38282)

On 09/22/2011 at 12:44am - misc - by mortenp - United States (Maryland)

Today, while at work, after reading more than 100 FMLs and moderating more than 500, I decided to write one of my own with the help of my boss, who had been standing next to me for over an hour. "How about being fired?" FML

Today, I was fired for being a very happy and perky employee. According to my boss, it freaks both the customers and my co-workers out. FML

#17780072
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23799) - you deserved it (6059)

On 09/19/2011 at 11:56am - work - by Lexiebear27 - United States

Today, I got kicked in the crotch. It popped my cherry. I lost my virginity to a shoe. FML

#17779717
425 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53472) - you deserved it (5273)

On 09/19/2011 at 10:39am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my school voted for a Pokémon theme for this year's homecoming. FML

#17773811
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33153) - you deserved it (16737)

On 09/18/2011 at 5:16pm - misc - by ohgodwhy - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my friends and I ran through a flock of resting seagulls. The birds took to the skies and chased after us, covering us in shit. FML

#17773363
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7806) - you deserved it (44589)

On 09/18/2011 at 4:17pm - animals - by shithead (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, on my way to a concert, some guy told me I had cool sunglasses. I was about to thank him until he punched me in the face. I woke up with no sunglasses and no ticket. FML

Today, I got pulled over for distracted driving. Not for cell phone use but for nose picking and inspecting. FML

#17762690
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8724) - you deserved it (32732)

On 09/17/2011 at 4:37am - misc - by jj4320 - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend gave me a speech on me "not being manly enough". I started crying. FML

#17762644
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16691) - you deserved it (46890)

On 09/17/2011 at 4:17am - love - by Anonymous - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I will be sleeping in my aunt and uncle's living room. It is 90 degrees. There is an air conditioner but if you turn it on, the raccoons living in the wall will get pissed off and try to claw through the wall. Only five more nights sweating my balls off or imagining racoons having angry sex. FML

Today, my daughter-in-law revealed to me that she caught my husband having an affair with her best friend. This was five years ago, and she is only telling me now because he stopped paying her the blackmail money to keep her mouth shut. FML

#17761780
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34188) - you deserved it (2226)

On 09/17/2011 at 12:43am - love - by cheated (woman) - United States (California)



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