lauryn_lovely

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Offline (the 06/27/2016 at 7:38am)

lauryn_lovely

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  • Number of visits : 2186
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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lauryn_lovely's page activity

Visits<b>Wizardo</b> - the 10/01/2013 at 4:38am<b>MRVOlivia</b> - the 09/27/2013 at 11:14pm

lauryn_lovely's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of lauryn_lovely's badges

lauryn_lovely's favorite FMLs

Today, I was given an entire week of detention for planking on my school desk. FML

by planking champion / 10/17/2011 at 6:05pm / United States (North Dakota) / Miscellaneous

Today, my brother in law got into a fight with my husband. My pregnant sister was yelling at her husband to stop beating my husband up. When I came into the room, I asked why they were fighting. You'll never guess who the real father of my sister's baby is. FML

by Good sister / 10/13/2011 at 7:20pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, after reading about seduction techniques, I wore shades and a brightly colored shirt to a club to attract female attention. However, the sunglasses rendered me almost blind, and I tripped over a step, crashed into tables, and thanks to the shirt, everyone saw it happen in glorious technicolor. FML

by hardtoignore / 10/02/2011 at 9:34pm / United States (South Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned no matter how much your friends pressure you, you must never snort lines of curry powder. FML

by Anonymous / 10/01/2011 at 2:48am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, the shy girl in my class decided to bring a cake to share with everyone, since it was her birthday. Excited about the cake, I got everybody to sing "happy birthday" for her, only to realize too late that nobody in the class know her name, myself included. FML

by mortenp / 09/22/2011 at 12:44am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, while at work, after reading more than 100 FMLs and moderating more than 500, I decided to write one of my own with the help of my boss, who had been standing next to me for over an hour. "How about being fired?" FML

Today, I was fired for being a very happy and perky employee. According to my boss, it freaks both the customers and my co-workers out. FML

by Lexiebear27 / 09/19/2011 at 11:56am / United States / Work

Today, I got kicked in the crotch. It popped my cherry. I lost my virginity to a shoe. FML

by Anonymous / 09/19/2011 at 10:39am / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, my school voted for a Pokémon theme for this year's homecoming. FML

by ohgodwhy / 09/18/2011 at 5:16pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friends and I ran through a flock of resting seagulls. The birds took to the skies and chased after us, covering us in shit. FML

by shithead / 09/18/2011 at 4:17pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Animals

Today, on my way to a concert, some guy told me I had cool sunglasses. I was about to thank him until he punched me in the face. I woke up with no sunglasses and no ticket. FML

by incaseudidntkno / 09/18/2011 at 9:36am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I got pulled over for distracted driving. Not for cell phone use but for nose picking and inspecting. FML

by jj4320 / 09/17/2011 at 4:37am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, my girlfriend gave me a speech on me "not being manly enough". I started crying. FML

by Anonymous / 09/17/2011 at 4:17am / South Africa (Gauteng) / Love

Today, I will be sleeping in my aunt and uncle's living room. It is 90 degrees. There is an air conditioner but if you turn it on, the raccoons living in the wall will get pissed off and try to claw through the wall. Only five more nights sweating my balls off or imagining racoons having angry sex. FML

by ironik970 / 09/17/2011 at 2:56am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my daughter-in-law revealed to me that she caught my husband having an affair with her best friend. This was five years ago, and she is only telling me now because he stopped paying her the blackmail money to keep her mouth shut. FML

by cheated / 09/17/2011 at 12:43am / United States (California) / Love