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About lauraboo438 : I'm not interesting enough to write anything here.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was being pulled into a pool by my girlfriend. To avoid ruining my phone, I tossed it into one of the chairs behind me. I missed and it landed into the hot tub behind it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36090) - you deserved it (7266)
On 06/15/2009 at 2:10pm - misc - by WetPhone (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML
I agree, your life sucks (88872) - you deserved it (52486)
On 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by badmom (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, my adorable five and a half year old boy told me that when he grows up he's going to be my boyfriend. I thought it was kinda cute until I asked him why. "Because you need one." FML
I agree, your life sucks (49321) - you deserved it (4446)
On 06/10/2009 at 9:12am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maine)
Today, I had a date with this really cute guy. He invited me over to make dinner at his place. Eventually we end up in his bedroom to have sex. He pulls down my panties and says, "You need to shave that shit." FML
I agree, your life sucks (45317) - you deserved it (48832)
On 06/09/2009 at 1:27am - intimacy - by lagirl (woman) - United States (California)
Today, the girl I am in love with invited me to stay with her in Europe for 2 weeks, she is even paying for the flights and accommodation. It's because I am such a special friend to her and she wants me to come up to meet her fiancé before she gets married. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51318) - you deserved it (3889)
On 06/08/2009 at 9:28pm - love - by doomed (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, I was playing around with my sister's kitten. As a joke, I put him underneath the sheets and farted. He attacked my nuts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25488) - you deserved it (232648)
On 06/07/2009 at 11:53am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was walking on a path through a park by myself. I glanced at the ground and saw a shadow behind me. Thinking of an attacker, I screamed as loud as I could and began flailing my arms to ward him off. Turns out, it was a jogger. He had to stop due to his uncontrollable laughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8824) - you deserved it (35337)
On 06/06/2009 at 12:43am - misc - by paranoid (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, while running on the treadmill at the gym, the girl next to me slipped and went flying back against the wall. Indecisive whether to get off and help her or to just keep going, I lost my focus and footing and flew back next to her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42820) - you deserved it (17999)
On 06/05/2009 at 1:03am - health - by NoPainNoGain (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was driving on the motorway when a cop car made me stop. It was a routine check and when they said "Have you been drinking?" of course I said no. To that, my 6 year old sitting in the back screamed "Yes she did! She's lying I saw her drink!" I had drunk a milkshake. FML
I agree, your life sucks (77261) - you deserved it (3978)
On 06/04/2009 at 8:17am - kids - by Kimmiko (woman) - Germany (Niedersachsen)
Today, I meant to express to my friends that I was enamored with a young saleswoman I had encountered at a store. I wanted to tell them that she was quite petite and that I am, in general, attracted to petite women. Instead I said "You know? I like little girls." FML
I agree, your life sucks (14214) - you deserved it (42317)
On 06/03/2009 at 1:23am - love - by boinger (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was riding on my bike when a guy on the street shouted, "I LOVE YOU!" at me. I recently told my boyfriend I loved him, and his response was, "I don't love you but I won't treat you any differently." Perverts on the street love me, but my boyfriend doesn't. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40628) - you deserved it (3471)
On 06/03/2009 at 12:34am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59322) - you deserved it (144025)
On 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm - animals - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I heard a baby crying while I was walking down the street. I walked around until I found it. In a dumpster. I immediately called the cops, completely freaking out. When the cops came, they pulled the baby out of the dumpster. It was a plastic baby doll. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36797) - you deserved it (16109)
On 06/02/2009 at 2:18am - kids - by failbaby (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I was at the extremely crowded gym when someone came up behind me and shouted in my ear scaring the living shit out of me. I jump into a karate pose in front of everyone. No one was behind me. It was a new song starting on my headphones. A trainer asked me if I needed an ambulance. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23433) - you deserved it (47361)
On 06/01/2009 at 9:53pm - health - by dearme (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I was cleaning out my bedside table when I came across some condoms I bought on my 18th birthday, to use the first time I had sex. They expired five years ago. I'm still waiting for my first time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (60220) - you deserved it (8513)
On 05/31/2009 at 5:10pm - intimacy - by fmeplease (woman) - United Kingdom (Kent)
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