lamarr

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lamarr

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 31 July 1990 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 22294
  • Number of comments : 53
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About lamarr : THRASH 'TIL DEATH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

lamarr's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 11:25am<b>The_Unlucky1</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 11:02pm<b>annoyedperson</b> - the 04/20/2016 at 11:54pm<b>l3g1t1matp1mp3n</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 3:29pm<b>PinkaLotaPoka</b> - the 03/19/2016 at 11:26am<b>Cdwoods</b> - the 03/16/2016 at 1:23am<b>HorrorJr</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 4:46pm<b>2C0OL4SCH0OL</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 3:20pm<b>maddymarie123</b> - the 12/19/2015 at 4:22pm<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 5:53pm<b>Beedrus</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 3:11pm<b>saucybugger101</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 4:50pm<b>ItsKennyBaby</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 4:15pm<b>jelly_bennett</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 3:27am<b>missadell</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 4:50pm<b>TheJasonLi</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 12:43am<b>senor_octubre</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 7:01pm<b>kaiboi702</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 1:59am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 5:49am

lamarr's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

lamarr's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad was on the couch and I sat down next to him. As I was reading a text message, I saw my dad's fat stomach sticking out so I patted it. After the first two pats, I realized I was patting in the wrong place. I patted the family jewels. FML

by whatashame / 04/01/2009 at 1:15am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. We were feeling a little naughty, so we started talking dirty. I was really into describing a sweaty sex scene, when I heard my dad cough. He had picked up the phone to make a call and had heard it all. FML

by Bucko321 / 03/29/2009 at 9:18pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I was on a first date with a girl at the movies. Trying to be polite, I held in a fart until an intense, loud action scene came on. As soon as I let go, the scene went silent and my fart was clearly heard to everyone in the movie theatre. My date went to the bathroom. She didn't come back. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2009 at 2:50pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, I realized my friends and I should be more careful what we say around my younger brother. I never thought he was paying attention until today. My stepmom told him it was time to go to bed. He responded, "I think it's time for you to suck one." My brother is 4. FML

by Alex / 03/26/2009 at 12:42am / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, I was texting two people at once. Trying to respond to my friend's text, I accidentally clicked on this guy's name instead, who I've never met. He just told me about his grandma's funeral he went to that was an open casket. I responded with, "Haha wow you slut, I'm sure you were aroused." FML

by ohhotdamn / 03/25/2009 at 10:48pm / United States (Kansas) / Geek

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2009 at 12:46am / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, I got hypnotized in front of my entire school. Once I was hypnotized the guy told me that the hottest celebrity in the world was in the audience and then he told me to point out who I saw. I said I saw Mick Jagger. I'm a guy. FML

by Anonymous / 03/20/2009 at 11:10pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, when I was at the gynecologist my dr told me that I was really tense and the exam would be impossible if I didnt relax. So I started thinking about my boyfriend to relax and my mind went back to our last sex session. I started getting wet. FML

by Anonymous / 03/19/2009 at 3:10pm / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, me and my boyfriend came back to my house after a night on the town. Thinking the house was empty, we had sex. Just as it was getting good my phone rings. It was a text from my mom, "Quiet down. Even your father can tell you're faking." FML

by MrAwsum / 03/17/2009 at 4:40pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, I went on my porch for a late night cigarette. When I opened the door and took one step inside, all I remember is a big thud. I woke up 5 minutes later with my Father over top of me saying "nice right hook, huh?" Then he chuckled. He thought I was a burgler and he knocked me out. FML

by Noname / 03/11/2009 at 2:04am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went on a run with this cute guy I know. I was sweating untractively and profusely so I decided to discretly grab a leaf from a tree and wipe my face with it. A bird had done the same with his ass few minutes ago. FML

by broussimousse / 03/10/2009 at 4:42pm / United Kingdom (London) / Animals

Today, I was working at Old Navy. A girl came up to me and did a bizarre dance. Not knowing how to react, I imitated her to be friendly with the customer. Then she stopped cold. Her friend stormed up to me and yelled, "you jerk! Why are you mocking her? She has tourettes you know!" FML

by Ricky / 03/08/2009 at 8:00pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, my very religious grandmother walked in on me masturbating. She's sending me to bible camp. FML

by camp / 03/03/2009 at 5:14pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up at my boyfriend's place with grumbling stomach pains. I left him in bed to go have explosive diarreah in the bathroom next to his room. When I was done, I came back to bed and snuggled in next to his sleeping form and he rolled over to whisper, "I heard everthing." FML

by ohmygoodness / 03/02/2009 at 4:51pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, I was walking through Borders with my girlfriend, when we pass a girl scout cookies stand. I see a box of Samoas, my favorite, point at them, and shout, 'YEAH'. My girlfriend looks shocked. Behind the box of cookies was a five year old scout bending over, with her bottom pointed at me. FML

by Scottrick / 03/01/2009 at 12:55pm / United States (Virginia) / Love