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lalap

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 31737
  • Number of comments : 41
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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lalap's page activity

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lalap's FML badges

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lalap's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at my job as a flight attendant. A passenger on my plane stopped breathing and turned blue. As I cleared his airways and was busy strapping an oxygen mask to his face, the passenger behind him tried to hand me her trash. Apparently I'm a walking trash can, no matter what I'm doing. FML

#4100528
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61150) - you deserved it (2851)

On 07/28/2009 at 3:29am - work - by skygoddess (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was peeing in a urinal at a bar. A drunk guy comes in, and seeing no urinals open, he decides to pee between my legs from behind me. He didn't have good aim. FML

#4081805
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61718) - you deserved it (3116)

On 07/27/2009 at 3:07pm - misc - by webperson04 (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I thought I would surprise my dad by mowing our entire 2 acre lawn. When he got home, instead of being grateful like I had hoped, he yelled at me for cutting in vertical lines instead of horizontal. FML

#4079687
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50229) - you deserved it (3649)

On 07/27/2009 at 1:25pm - misc - by overthehorizon (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my 50-year-old mother borrowed my denim miniskirt to go to the bar. In return, she offered to let me borrow her red "f*** me" pumps whenever I needed them. FML

#4061190
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38124) - you deserved it (2899)

On 07/26/2009 at 7:51pm - misc - by mvp (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went on the large bungee drop at the West Edmonton Mall waterpark. As I was falling, my bikini top came off. I had to wait for the bungee rope to stop moving and the life guard to release the ankle strap. FML

#4056624
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40122) - you deserved it (12719)

On 07/26/2009 at 4:06pm - misc - by HorrorByrd (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while doing aerobics in my room, I started doing really powerful Knee Highs. My cell phone fell out of my pocket while doing one knee high. As I looked down, I kneed myself in the face. I spent the next couple hours in the emergency room while the doctor told everyone my story. FML

#4054233
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32057) - you deserved it (17876)

On 07/26/2009 at 1:39pm - health - by mobster (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went to a funeral for my coworker's father. While there, my dad's cell phone rang and he left to answer it. I turned to my brother and said, "I can't believe he brought his cell phone!" He whispered, "I can't believe he's got coverage. This is a dead zone!" I laughed loudly. At a funeral. FML

#4053619
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21811) - you deserved it (53389)

On 07/26/2009 at 1:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, I passed a homeless person asking for change. When I politely apologized and told him I had none, he yelled angrily "who comes to this city without money?" I replied "apparently, you do." Wrong answer. He followed me, now screaming. FML

#4029321
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45320) - you deserved it (26121)

On 07/25/2009 at 12:39pm - money - by re2K5 (man) - Korea Republic of (Kyongsang-bukto)

Today, I met with an important client to talk about his stake in the company. The guy was at least 80 years old. After taking care of business we spoke about my final year at the company. As he got up to leave he said "Good luck in your final year". Without thinking, I replied "You too". FML

#3899381
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32629) - you deserved it (13940)

On 07/20/2009 at 3:13am - work - by moutz (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, after not seeing my boyfriend for 9 months, he came to meet me at the airport. I was so excited when I first saw him that I broke into a sprint to greet him. Apparently, running through the airport looks suspicious, because a security guard tackled me. Now I have a broken nose. FML

#3878343
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50716) - you deserved it (6755)

On 07/19/2009 at 9:49am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was going on a first date with a girl I really like. We were going to see the new Harry Potter movie, and she told me she was getting all dressed up. It was only after I picked her up I realized she meant that she was dressing nicely. I was dressed as Harry Potter. FML

#3866065
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27162) - you deserved it (59726)

On 07/18/2009 at 9:26pm - misc - by harrysolo (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, after a night of partying, I woke up in the middle of my co-ed dorm lobby to the sound of giggles. I was in a thong with $1 monopoly bills sticking out. I'm a guy. FML

#3849129
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14145) - you deserved it (46193)

On 07/18/2009 at 2:03am - misc - by joedoe (man) - United States (California)

Today, at work, a customer called in and asked me to read off every item on our menu, along with their ingredients. I work at Jamba Juice so that's a lot of reading. After about 10 minutes of this, I found out it was actually my stupid co-worker calling from the back phone. FML

#3848671
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37212) - you deserved it (9184)

On 07/18/2009 at 1:45am - work - by Rawf (man) - United States (California)

Today, I awoke to my husband donning a gorilla mask in the middle of the night. My kids have been staying in a tent out back for the past few nights, and have complained of a "monster" scaring them. I told them that it was their imagination. My husband says he gets a kick out of it. FML

#3837360
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44374) - you deserved it (6310)

On 07/17/2009 at 6:02pm - kids - by Divorcemenow (woman) - United States (Michigan)



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