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kuiyra

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kuiyra

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 125
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About kuiyra : Leave me alone.

kuiyra's page activity

Visits<b>Conrob</b> - the 10/20/2013 at 9:13am

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kuiyra's favorite FMLs

Today, I was applying for jobs online when my father called. When I told him what I was doing, he said in all seriousness that I should just be a sugar baby. I said he must be joking, but he replied, "Honey, if I had your tits, I'd never work a day in my life." 5ML

#21037822
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41663) - you deserved it (4555)

On 01/24/2014 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my family and I were having turkey for dinner. My boyfriend leaned in towards me and muttered, "I'll stuff your turkey later". Everyone heard and the whole room went dead silent. FML

Today, I was walking home from work, when I slipped and fell on a patch of ice. I clambered back to my feet, made it three feet, then slipped and fell again. A guy who'd witnessed the whole thing stuck his head out of his car window and yelled "Dumbasssssss!" FML

#21031072
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40533) - you deserved it (5631)

On 01/17/2014 at 6:28pm - health - by SqueakingRetard (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after his sixth beer, my dad looked me in the eye and said "I've never forgiven you for what you did to your mother's vagina". FML

#21025234
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56023) - you deserved it (5630)

On 01/12/2014 at 1:38am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, a guy I like asked me to a dance. Trying to act modest and at the same time compliment him, I told him, "You could do so much better, though." After thinking for a moment, he replied, "You're right, I could. Never mind," and walked away. FML

#21020576
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28450) - you deserved it (55004)

On 01/07/2014 at 7:39pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I was at a basketball game. Sitting in the bleachers, I looked over at my friend and said, "Number 33 has a really cute butt." The man in front of us turned around, looked me dead in the eye, and said, "Thanks." Number 33's dad was a very proud father. FML

#21017330
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46708) - you deserved it (12651)

On 01/05/2014 at 12:30am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, my son was playing The Sims, when I saw him remove the door to a room and set it on fire with a Sim trapped inside. I chuckled at first, until I saw that the Sim was me. Meanwhile, my wife's Sim was happily painting in the next room, not giving a crap. All too accurate, sadly. FML

#21015673
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46105) - you deserved it (4956)

On 01/03/2014 at 4:50pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I watched my father attempt to light a cigar with the stove and end up burning off some hair and eyebrows. He tried to play it cool, said, "Haircuts are too expensive these days anyway." and walked out, his head smoking. This man is a college professor. FML

Today, I went to my bedroom for some alone time while my daughter watched TV. I didn't realize that my iPad was still connected to the Apple TV, until I hit play on some porn and heard a scream from the other room. FML

#21008990
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25592) - you deserved it (52695)

On 12/29/2013 at 2:01am - kids - by ConfusedDad - United States

Today, I took an extra xanax to help with my anxiety, then went to sleep. I guess it was probably too much, because I woke up a few hours later, freaking out and panicking because I was convinced I was a bee trapped in a human body. FML

#21008430
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40272) - you deserved it (9585)

On 12/28/2013 at 4:19pm - health - by beemove (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, it's been a little over a month since my dad started taking yoga lessons. We always joked around behind his back that he was just doing it so he could get flexible enough to suck himself off. Well, that joke was confirmed as reality when I walked in on him trying just that. FML

#21001267
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50018) - you deserved it (6927)

On 12/22/2013 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by bleach bleach bleach (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my dog played dead just so I would leave him alone. FML

#20991879
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36796) - you deserved it (6330)

On 12/14/2013 at 12:05am - animals - by Crystal_Nicole - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was driving home, when a truck overtook me. Two of the Christmas trees it was carrying fell off straight into my bumper. The car behind me pulled over, but instead of seeing if I was okay, he just went to see whether or not either of the trees was in good enough shape to take home. FML

#20981618
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35638) - you deserved it (2492)

On 12/05/2013 at 12:41pm - health - by mooselord (man) - United States

Today, I saw my friend's car in front of school. I'd had a bad day and just wanted to talk with her. I got in and sat down, and felt something squish beneath me. Turns out it wasn't actually my friend's car, and I'd just sat on a random woman's cake. FML

#20978310
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35439) - you deserved it (24838)

On 12/02/2013 at 3:04pm - misc - by Sherressa (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)



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