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kturtle92's page activity

Visits<b>miwako</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 10:32pm<b>MeCoCo</b> - the 02/02/2013 at 11:08am<b>infamous1212</b> - the 01/23/2013 at 11:02pm

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kturtle92's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my Dad if it was true that my mother had a C-section at my birth. He replied "Yeah, so technically you weren't even born, you were surgically removed, like a tumor." FML


I agree, your life sucks (38778) - you deserved it (4785)

On 09/01/2011 at 7:40pm - misc - by mannydanny (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, I was installing updates on my 16 year old daughter's laptop, when I got the urge to snoop around. I found a 5,000 word sex story involving her and the Edward and Jacob weirdos from the Twilight movies. I can't even look her in the eyes. I can't believe I raised this freak. FML


I agree, your life sucks (32948) - you deserved it (53067)

On 08/26/2011 at 9:13pm - kids - by f*ckingdisgusted - United States

Today, my drunk father chased me down the street with my little brother's light saber screaming, "Come back Yoda! Teach me how to use the force!" FML


I agree, your life sucks (39389) - you deserved it (4673)

On 07/08/2011 at 1:23am - misc - by Yoda (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend and I were play wrestling. I had pinned him down and was sitting on his chest when he suddenly squeezed my stomach, causing me to rip the loudest fart ever. He looked so shocked that I couldn't help but laugh. I laughed so hard that I accidentally peed on him as well. FML


I agree, your life sucks (41176) - you deserved it (18822)

On 12/31/2009 at 3:04pm - love - by pottypattypeepants (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, a funny smelling liquid was sprayed all over the computer. Last week, I told my fully pottytrained but extremely reluctant toddler that he couldn't play Barney games until he used the big boy toilet. A 4 year old's revenge really sucks. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28568) - you deserved it (5347)

On 11/29/2009 at 4:10pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was at my friend's dorm eating supper. He and all his roommates are Chinese, and since I'm majoring in Chinese, I could understand what they were talking about. Too bad none of his friends knew that, and talked about banging me while I was sitting there. FML


I agree, your life sucks (30483) - you deserved it (3639)

On 09/27/2009 at 11:16pm - intimacy - by NiHao (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I yelled at my little brother for leaving the toilet seat up and told him he needed to go around the house and make sure they were all down. I went to the bathroom later to find that the toilet seats and covers from every toilet had all been removed and were sitting on my bed. FML


I agree, your life sucks (16785) - you deserved it (66102)

On 03/06/2009 at 12:49pm - kids - by wetbutt (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

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  • Here we are in November! Winter is here, for most of us, it's dark, grey and depressing and if you're the kind of person who watches network news 24/7, you're probably going to need some cheering up.…

Monday 30 November 2015

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