kthxbie

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kthxbie

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 7 June 1992 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1655
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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kthxbie's page activity

Visits<b>RectumRecker</b> - the 09/01/2016 at 7:12pm<b>__doge__</b> - the 08/15/2016 at 6:23am<b>thefmlman2011</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 5:58pm<b>FRAGILE</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 9:48am<b>CassidyQueen98</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 6:18pm<b>D_Word_Head</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 10:01pm<b>DisCreation</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 10:45am<b>nitrams</b> - the 07/14/2013 at 2:25am<b>thermos159</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 10:41am<b>Skittles_Wiki</b> - the 07/12/2013 at 4:16am<b>adam97</b> - the 07/05/2013 at 10:18am<b>EwwwWtf</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 9:16pm<b>Ishq786</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 2:58pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 06/22/2013 at 4:49pm<b>gary3768</b> - the 05/31/2013 at 1:01am<b>AudreySucks</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 4:59am<b>thatguy888888</b> - the 05/18/2013 at 1:09am<b>Revan619</b> - the 05/17/2013 at 5:05am

Fucked!<b>FRAGILE</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 3:48pm

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kthxbie's favorite FMLs

Today, I played a game of Monopoly with my friends. Since I'm of Greek origin, they thought it would be funny to make me start with a €100,000 debt. FML

by Money-money-money / 12/13/2012 at 9:25pm / France / Money

Today, my drunk girlfriend maxed out my credit card, on an "authentic" Jesus Christ autograph on eBay. FML

by maxedoutidiot / 12/12/2012 at 9:14pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time; he asked me to explain my interest in dating her. In a mix of me trying to say "I want to be with your daughter" and "I want to be in your daughter's life" I got confused and said, "I want to be in your daughter." FML

by Tonguetied0496 / 12/10/2012 at 2:21am / United States (California) / Love

Today, "The Phantom of the Opera" soundtrack blasted me awake at 4 am. Not knowing how it got on my iPod, I checked and found I had bought the whole $17.00 album in my sleep. This is the second time this month; the first time I downloaded the soundtrack from "The Wizard of Oz". FML

by hailey / 12/10/2012 at 12:10am / United States (Maryland) / Money

Today, my girlfriend started a huge fight with me over how I don't have the right to have close female friends anymore. She ended up storming off, and won't return my calls. But no worries: she did just play the word "murder" in our game of Words With Friends. Very comforting. FML

Today, out of curiosity, I measured the length of my penis whilst in the shower. A couple of hours later, my father called me downstairs to show me something. Turns out I left the ruler on top of the shower tree. He won't stop laughing. FML

by Infiltrator4444 / 07/25/2012 at 9:11pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy

Today, I received a "get well soon" card in the mail, which I found just a little odd, since I was feeling completely fine. Not an hour later, I tripped and fell down a flight of stairs. FML

by Anonymous / 07/24/2012 at 1:36pm / United States / Health

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

by Bontempi / 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally realized how depressed I am when I found bubble wrap and didn't feel like popping it. FML

by Epiphany / 07/19/2012 at 5:01am / United States / Health

Today, I had a few friends over. Wanting to seem cool, I yelled at my girlfriend to get me a beer. She chucked four bottles at my head. All my friends cheered her on. FML

by Anonymous / 07/19/2012 at 12:55am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was using a penis pump for the first time. It was awesome until it sucked my left testicle into the tube. I'll be singing soprano for a while now. FML

by tuggernuts / 07/17/2012 at 11:32am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I went to my regular pharmacist of three months, and since I've always seen him on a crutch, I asked him how his leg was. His response: "Still missing". FML

by sozzy / 07/07/2012 at 3:26am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having a debate with my friend over tattoos. I used the example that you wouldn't put a bumper sticker on a Ferrari. He looked me in the eye and said, "Yeah, but you're no Ferrari. More like a Prius." FML

by kitty shah / 06/17/2012 at 1:01pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I visited my new doctor for the migraines I've been getting lately. Right from the start, I could have sworn the guy was on drugs. He just listened to my heartbeat, said, "Well Dave, it sounds like gallstones" and said they'll pass naturally. FML

by davav74 / 06/15/2012 at 7:31pm / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Health

Today, I was joking around with my eight-year-old son. I told him to pull my finger. I farted, then laughed. He decided to try it on his mother. When she pulled his finger, he crapped his pants. He told her I taught him how to do it. FML

by habbsrule / 06/15/2012 at 10:21am / Canada / Kids