koalasloverain

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koalasloverain

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 27 January 1989 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1190
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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koalasloverain's page activity

Visits<b>wondercat40</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 6:41pm<b>vinylscratchp0n3</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 7:25pm<b>lindmar</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 10:02am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 2:57pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/24/2014 at 10:20pm<b>MrBoredomioo</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 12:44am<b>DashFTW</b> - the 05/27/2013 at 12:26am<b>ch2358</b> - the 11/10/2009 at 4:55pm<b>kayla_f_babyyy</b> - the 11/09/2009 at 1:55pm

koalasloverain's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

koalasloverain's favorite FMLs

Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML

by Satan / 03/15/2010 at 7:22pm / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, I went to Starbucks to use the bathroom. After I knocked on the door, and turned the handle, this little old lady rips the door open and goes "I WAS TAKING A DUMP. YOU WANNA COME IN AND WIPE MY SHIT? DO YOU?!" and then continued to ask me the same question for five minutes. FML

by bathroomblunder / 03/06/2010 at 9:38pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend watching a home made sex tape he had previously made with his ex-girlfriend. What's worse than him jerking off to it? He was crying and hugging a pillow. FML

by Anonymous / 02/02/2010 at 10:40am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He tried to put it in unerected. He was serious. FML

by xxxzzzooo / 01/02/2010 at 12:22pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my mom revealed to me that when I was in Preschool, I used to get caught in the bathroom with little boys while I was feeling their "no no" area. I was giving hand jobs to boys before I could read. FML

by Anonymous / 12/15/2009 at 9:20pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I learned explosive diarrhea is real. I felt it coming and dashed into our supermarket. 10 feet in, liquid poo started spewing down my pants legs. 150 feet to go. I ran. It ran. They watched. After 15 minutes of cleaning, I slunk out. Now, I have to find a new market, maybe a new town. FML

by Anonymous / 11/24/2009 at 6:44am / United States (Alabama) / Health

Today, I got a call from my ex asking if I could fix her computer. I brought my 7 year old son with me. On the way I told him, how I hated her, but I can't be rude. Once we get there, I say to her "it's nice to see you." My son says "but I thought you said you want her to fall off a bridge?" FML

by Dan / 11/08/2009 at 8:08pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, there was something itching me in my bed, it was the tag to my pillow case. I ripped it off, very hard and slipped and punched myself right in the face. I broke my nose. FML

by jellybean / 11/06/2009 at 6:37pm / United States / Health