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Today, I discovered that I have been falsely accusing my sister of stealing my makeup. How do I know this? Because I found said makeup in the trunk of my boyfriend's car, next to a bag that had fishnet tights and red stilettos in it. Oh, and the stilettos are his size, in case you were wondering. FML
by SingleAgain / 08/03/2012 at 2:22am / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was reading a book on paper for the first time in maybe a month. I had to stop at a word I did not recognise. Because I'm so used to using a Kindle, I tried to get the definition by pressing it. I had my finger on the word for a few seconds before I realised it was paper. FML
by Bilze / 05/17/2012 at 2:57pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
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- Today, I walked in on my husband having sex with the shower wall. When I got in the shower with him… Today, I sat awkwardly and pretended like I didn't notice my cousin discreetly trying to masturbate… Today, I was the first guy ever to give my girlfriend an orgasm. I was also the first guy to make…
- Today, a car almost hit me. Since I wasn’t hurt, the driver chased me with a baseball bat to finish… Today, my boyfriend whispered to me, “I’m so tired of these fucking mosquitos.” When I asked why he… Today, at 11:30 p.m., after a 5-hour train journey to get back to Paris carrying a suitcase that’s…