About kmccain : So what brought you here? Was it my guinea pig, Hamlet, one of my smart ass comments, or are you just being a stalker?
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Socialite
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
Today, as I was yelled at by a middle school teacher in front of 30 6th graders for breaking the rule of "no cell phones in school." Luckily, I escaped being sent to the office after explaining I'm a 21 year old college student doing student teaching observations, not a middle schooler. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23062) - you deserved it (3433)
On 11/20/2009 at 12:24pm - misc - by NotInMiddleSchool (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I auditioned for a part and made it because the director thought I would be "perfect" for the part and I was "just like the character in every way." The part is for a schizophrenic drug addict who everyone hates and is stabbed to death in the second scene. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20891) - you deserved it (3362)
On 11/12/2009 at 4:37pm - work - by Falafax (man) - United States
Today, I auditioned for a part and made it because the director thought I would be "perfect" for the part and I was "just like the character in every way." The part is for a schizophrenic drug addict who everyone hates and is stabbed to death in the second scene. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20891) - you deserved it (3362)
On 11/12/2009 at 4:37pm - work - by Falafax (man) - United States
Today, I went to a petting zoo with my niece and nephew. While we were checking out the llamas, one of them spit directly into my face. Disgusted and embarrassed, we turned away to pet a deer. The deer immediately urinated then shook its tail which splattered it into my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23600) - you deserved it (2131)
On 11/07/2009 at 9:13pm - misc - by shando - United States (Nevada)
Today, I got to work in the ER at the local hospital. A lady came in with high blood sugar. She was concerned because the same thing happened to her husband. I reassured her, telling her she'll be back with her husband in an hour or so. Her husband died four years ago from something similar. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19308) - you deserved it (5174)
On 11/05/2009 at 7:40pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my aunt came into the world. My 67 year-old grandfather married a 24 year-old woman who just gave birth to my new aunt, who is 18 years younger than me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35489) - you deserved it (2489)
On 11/02/2009 at 11:10am - misc - by notsohappyniece (woman) - United States (Alabama)
Today, my math teacher decided to use my acne as an example of symmetry in front of the whole class. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44719) - you deserved it (2692)
On 10/21/2009 at 2:59am - health - by acneface (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I decided to take a personal day from class and e-mailed all of my profs saying I had flu symptoms. While standing in line at Starbucks later, someone behind me says "Glad you're feeling better. Hope you can attend class tomorrow, we'll discuss lying." It was my Ethics professor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4937) - you deserved it (38658)
On 10/20/2009 at 10:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, my research partner emails me 2 hours before our deadline saying that she can't complete her half of our 20 page report because when she woke up this morning she couldn't see. How did she write the email? FML
I agree, your life sucks (32993) - you deserved it (1574)
On 10/18/2009 at 11:04pm - misc - by NUsConstantine (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I went to my hairdresser who promised me a haircut which "all the girls would want you" for. She gave me a combover. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16515) - you deserved it (2245)
On 10/13/2009 at 9:25pm - misc - by Chensticles - Sent from mobile version
Today, I spotted my neighbour's cat sitting on their front garden. I bent over and began walking towards it with my hand out saying, "Hello pussycat". I was only a few feet away when I realised I was talking to a white bag of sand. I turned to see my family in hysterics. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9337) - you deserved it (27002)
On 08/25/2009 at 7:40am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)
Today, I found out that the crumbs on the couch that look like the oreos you just ate, can actually turn out to be very crunchy, and have legs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7873) - you deserved it (35416)
On 08/22/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I gathered the courage to ask my crush on a date. As I called her, she quickly answered and said "Can't talk right now, I'm in a movie theater." and then hung up. I'd called her home phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31218) - you deserved it (2019)
On 08/21/2009 at 11:36am - love - by sophistication (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I swerved to avoid hitting a dog that ran in front of my car. The dog was fine but I hit a road sign, ripped off my rearview mirror, and cracked my passenger side window. When I got out to examine the damage to my car, the dog growled at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35399) - you deserved it (4535)
On 08/13/2009 at 12:49pm - animals - by animalover - United States (Georgia)
Today, I polished off the delicious iced gingerbread cookies in the pantry. I'd assumed the little flecks on them were speckles of broken icing, but as I went to throw the cookie bag away, a larva crawled out. The hundreds of flecks were moth eggs. I've been eating the cookies for three days. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41904) - you deserved it (15302)
On 08/10/2009 at 12:25am - animals - by Entheatus (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Friday 24 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
